Thirteen

I clocked 13 yesterday, but it was a big of a dog. It was a file I had taken from Emma's desk while she's on leave, and found out that it had to be returned because it wasn't exactly finished, and when we return a file, it counts as one.

Alanna told me this would count as my 13th, and the actual 13th that I handed in would be marked next month. I told her I wanted to give it back to Emma, but she wouldn't have any of it. Hmmm.

Today was Katie's first day in court by herself, she had a sev appeal. She was out of the office all day, don't know why.

At one point today I was walking past Yoshi's room and looked in. She turned around and smiled, but I was thinking it was more of a "what are you looking at" smile. I just can't help but look into people's rooms, I really should stop.

I actually didn't feel like working today. I just felt bored. It was like there wasn't a challenge anymore. Previously the challenge was to get 12. I'd done 13, and had already nearly finished five for next month, and next month hasn't even started yet!

At lunch I went for a run. I had planned to go to the harbour where the British candy shop was and get something novel for the people in the office. I bought these Cadbury 'Buttons' which looked kinda cute.

I ran half of the way back, bought some chicken for lunch and made rice with it. After I ate it I shared the chocolate around. When I gave it to Shareen, she grabbed the bottom of the pack with one hand and touched my fingers in the process. If she wasn't pregnant and getting married, I would've thought that was a sign. But, she is, so I'll just dismiss that as inadvertent. Sometimes I walk past her room and she looks totally hot with her glasses. Putting that aside, I admire how she manages to get that registry guy to open up. He hardly talks to anyone, I think he's a bit...special, but she always has a chat with him. I find that trait in a girl very appealing.

Also, when I came back from lunch, Karina tried to give me a mars bar but I was on the phone. After my phone call, I went to give her a chocolate button and she gave me half a mars bar. I wonder if she's showing interest. I don't know if I should pursue, because I feel like right now I'm just on a rebound from Katie. I also don't know if I'm misleading Karina by doing what I'm doing.

In the late afternoon I went out to get two lychee non-fat yoghurts. One was for Alanna. I wanted to thank her for helping me get 13 this month. I once walked into the photocopying room and into a conversation Amy was having with Therese, and Amy said that she hadn't gotten around to marking any of her briefs. That made me realise how lucky I was to have Alanna. I mean, if I did 13 and none of them had been marked, I'd be pretty pissed off.

A new lady supervisor started today. Wendy briefly introduced her to me. She seems like a nice person, but I still sure as hell hope I stick with Alanna.

I had intended to leave work at about 6ish to go do some late night shopping, but ended up staying till 7ish because I just felt like working. It was only until I realised I needed Alanna's help that I stopped.

I went walking along the main street aimlessly, and found myself checking out the footy store. I bought a black long sleeve top for training in the winter. These are my fetish now, but I must keep in mind not to buy too many because they'll be useless in summer.

Twelve

I formally notched my twelth file today. It was good to see that number on the system.

On the bus to work today, as I was standing and holding the railing, I noticed on my right arm the label of my new suit was still attached.

Oh god...I hope no one notices...

I put my arm down and used my left to hold the railing, only to have the guy next to me tap me on the shoulder and point to ANOTHER bigger tag on that arm.

Oh fucking hell...

I managed to laugh and say "yeah that's what happens when there are a million and one things to cut" and he said the same thing happened with his shorts. I thanked him and that was that. I did appreciate it though, he could've easily said nothing and let me walk around like a fool, so yeah, I appreciated it.

As I walked to the building I couldn't help but laugh at myself, lol.

In the morning, Alanna came into my room to give me back a file, and asked how my weekend was. I was like "alllllllright", and she asked "you didn't come into work did you? Is that why you're saying it like that?" I hesitated and then said yeah. She said something about me learning to work within the hours.

It was kinda a quiet day for me. Heath was on leave, Karina was at court and Turk was at court. I had planned to gym at noon, but ended up working till 1pm and then got changed for gym. I ran to the gym and it was soooo packed. I did a few exercises bar the benchpress and then jogged back.

I heated up canned soup and had it with some bread I had bought earlier. The soup wasn't as good as it looked, but it wasn't too bad.

Karina came in at about 3:30ish and told me about her day at court. She said she really enjoyed it, which I thought was the opposite - normally people find it stressful. She asked me about my weekend and I said I watched Kick Ass. When she was about to walk out I asked her about hers, and she said she came into the city on Anzac Day and saw the celebrations.

Alanna came in to return two files to me, which prompted Karina to go work on hers, lol.

I spent the rest of the day making Alanna's amendments and was so happy when I finally saw that number 12 on the system. In theory it meant I didn't really have to do anything else for the month, but then I thought "wait a minute, I'm ahead now, so let's stay ahead".

Earlier in the day I was heading to the photocopier room and bumped into Katie just as she came out. She looked up at me. I had already had this small grin on my face because I was in a good mood, but seeing her took that away, and we just looked at eachother blankly for a few moments before passing. I really wonder what's up with her.

She looked so worn down, it made me think if she was aging a bit too quickly for her age. Yoshi smiled and said hi to me today, I wonder if that's a sign of anything.

I stayed at work till close to 7pm, and I thought only Rat was left so I went to say bye. At first she just said bye and waved, but when I said something about her marking her briefs, she started on a whole conversation and I was like "uhhh..."

I noticed her look me up and down once, maybe because of the new suit. At the end she asked me how many briefs I had done and I said 12 (even though it'll probably be 13 by the end of the month). She said something (maybe flirtatiously) about either wanting or not wanting to mark mine. I didn't want to clarify, I just left and went to say goodbye to Wendy and exited.

Kick Ass

On Saturday after work I got the car and went to see Nabi. As usual, I waited in the waiting room after using the bathroom, and waited for about 5-10 minutes. The guy called me and I went to the staircase where Nabi was waiting. She grabbed my hand and led me up the stairs, making sure my hand was in contact with her butt.

I wanted to break the routine and grab her to kiss her after the door was closed, but didn't end up doing it. We settled into the routine, although she did seem a bit more playful.

We kissed again, but I noticed no tongue this time. Maybe she decided to back off? Or maybe she wasn't in the mood.

After the sex we had probably the best lay-down ever. Not much talking, but I held her and she leaned her head on my chest with her legs crossed over on top of mine. Sometimes she kissed me repeatedly on the cheek, but after a while she drifted off to sleep. I don't think I ever drifted off, so I noticed her heavy breathing afterwards, but this later turned into soft breathing as I realised she was asleep.

We got cold at one stage so she grabbed a towel and covered us with it. It felt good to hold her.

When her alarm sounded, I knew time was up, and because I have this extreme fear that the gangsters will bust up the room if I went into overtime, I'm usually pretty eager to shower and get out of there. But she turned off the alarm and kept holding me, not wanting to get up. After a few more moments of holding eachother, I asked if she wanted to shower first, and she said no, and just kept holding me. I joked that she would be a dirty girl and she said she didn't mind. After even longer I finally said I'd shower first and went.

As we got dressed she started saying stuff in Korean. I've heard of guys talk about girls swearing at them in Korean, but I don't think she was, just from the tone she said it in. I asked what she said and she said something about honey. When we were ready to go she playfully lifted up my sweater and kissed me and then we walked out. We bumped into two girls and guys heading into their room and waited for them to finish coming up the stairs. I saw one of the girls was Cindy. Damn she was hot. But I've chosen Nabi now and don't want to start things all over again.

We walked down the stairs and said goodbye, and I left.

Later that night I met up with Malay, Thai and his wife to get the bus out to the city. They wanted to take a taxi but a bus was coming and I said we'd make it on time. We did make it on time as we met Brain and Scope at the cinema.

We watched Kick Ass. I really wasn't looking forward to it, but it was actually pretty damn good. It had a bit of Kill Bill feel to it. I bought coke and popcorn and shared my popcorn around a bit in the beginning, but after seeing Brain sneeze into his hands I decided to stop it right there.

After the movie we went to KFC. I wasn't that hungry so I just ordered something small. We talked about the movie and other stuff. I sat opposite Brain and when he was about to tell me something, I realised what girls probably found unattractive about him (apart from his indecisiveness) - he has a hard time articulating himself. He was trying to tell me something, but his face just scrunched up, not really stuttering, but just unable to find the words to describe what he wanted to say, and so I ended up looking into his eyes for what seemed like a very long time waiting for him to say something, lol.

We all went home after that, and had a pretty good talk on the bus. As we were finding our seats, there was one left with a hot girl next to it, and one with an old guy. I decided to take the one next to the old guy to let Malay sit next to the hot one. Don't know why that factored into my decision.

Alternate realities at work

So yesterde I got up fairly early, got ready, drove to the Wick to return the DVD and then went to the city to pick up the barista Paul. He was a bit younger than I thought, and more friendly than I expected. We were a bit confused at first as to how to get onto the bridge, especially since the entrance I had planned on was closed, but we made it eventually and it was a pretty basic drive up there.

We talked a bit about our career background, but we mainly talked about the whole Melbourne Storm fiasco. Towards the end of the drive I started worrying about whether we'd get there in time, so I sped a little, not sure if he noticed or not, but he didn't say anything. Powerful car by the way, very powerful.

We got there at a little after 9am, and the car park we had driven into was opening at 9:15am, so he got out of the car and went to the court first. When the car park opened, I figured that I had enough time to get some petrol, so I did, and then parked back there again and strolled to the court. I saw Livak standing there and I waved to her. She asked me if I had the suitcases.

Shit!

I quickly ran back to the car to get them, lol. I bet you she thinks I'm such an idiot, lol.

When we got to court, it was interesting for me to be in a new place as I looked around everywhere. I sat there while Livak unpacked her files and Paul spoke to the defence. When the mag came on I noticed how young she looked, and also how familiar she looked. She was very attractive.

After Paul's mention, we talked about it as we walked out, and he told me her name and how she was with SLA before, and that's when it hit me: I must've seen her at SLA before!!

We had a coffee nearby (his shout) and then headed back to the car. As soon as we got onto the freeway there was a traffic jam, and we were stuck there for about 20 minutes, but after that everything was pretty flowy. He had a nap for most of the drive there, and I dropped him off in the city where I picked him up, then drove the car back to the office. Surprisingly, I managed to get it in and park it without scratching it.

When I got back to the office, I spent the next like half an hour trying to return the keys and talking to everyone who asked me how it went. I felt like some kind of a hero for some reason. I went to talk to Wendy first, and then Alanna. I told her about the mag, and how my goal was to be one, and she said "why not D court judge?" and I said it was good to be a mag, because if you make an error someone else will fix it up. This made her laugh, even though I didn't think it was that funny. She said she wanted to be a mag as well. I noticed some tablets on her desk and asked her if she was feeling ok, and she said she had a headache.

I went out for a run afterwards, went to the courts to ask about the courts that night and confirmed that they were open for shoot arounds. I ran back and bought some chicken for my lunch, and returned to the office, got changed and made my lunch. It was yummmmm, hehe.

I left work at about 5:30 to meet up with Jim and Bo for bball. As soon as I stepped into the courts, it was like I hadn't missed a beat, yet there was still something special for me. I walked past along the first court (where some bigger, more athletic guys were playing a full court game) only to see them standing around at the second court (where a bunch of smaller, mostly Asian guys, were playing half court games). We chatted a bit before one of the games stopped so we all converged on it to shoot around, and then a game was quickly organised.

I felt so...protected for my knee. I only wanted to do basic things and stay away from contact, but as time went by my confidence grew bit by bit. I hit a few jump shots from the outside, enough for one guy to make comments about it and stress to his team that I should be guarded, and then later tell me I had a beautiful shot. I appreciated the compliment, but was not used to it.

I did think about driving and trying to beat some guys off the dribble, but whenever I did I didn't have the confidence to go fast enough. Defence was hard, but that was because I was wearing my old shoes and they were slippery. I'd like to see how my knee fares with proper shoes on.

We played quite a few games, but at the end my legs cramped up and I had to walk off. I think they're just not used to all the jumping, shuffling and running. They'll come back.

I liked playing with Jim and Bo, I think I can get used to them. Jim's shot has improved, but he needs to be be within a short range. Bo seems to have this clunsy ability to get rebounds without jumping, and he's pretty chunky so he's a body that can bang. I did, however, have a problem with Jim's attitude. When we first talked about the other court, he was like "can't you see how big they are? We can't play there", whereas I was hoping we could play against them, cause you only improve by playing against the best. Also, in one of the last games, he was tired and basically just gave up, which contributed to the other team pretty much beating us scoreless.

After bball Bo and their friend Phil had to go to a club, so Jim and I went to eat at Macca's. We had a good chat, mainly about career. It really hit home to me that I'm at a part of my life where I need to start thinking about things such as buying a house and making as much money as possible. A few years ago when I started out with Nom, money really wasn't a factor, I just wanted the experience. But I've got plenty of that now, so maybe it's time to turn that into cash? Also, maybe aiming for a promotion will help you pay off your debts faster??

This got me thinking the other day about "alternate realities" at work and how lucky I was. I found out on Thursday that Heath will be transferred to another department, along with Rat and Kim, in some sort of trial program thing. I was saddened for a bit because I think Heath is the closest thing I have right now to a friend at work, but then I realised: shit, they could've easily sent Alanna instead of Rat, so I'm lucky they didn't. And I appreciate that.

Also, today I was at work and because I was all alone, I decided to pump up Eminem full blast. I walked past Katie's room once or twice going to the kitchen and the thought of checking out her room did cross my mind, but it wasn't strong enough to actually make me want to do it. So after about maybe 30 minutes of good work, I heard a female voice say my name.

I turned around and it was Yoshi. I quickly paused my music, and she asked if I had told security that I was in the building. I said no and I'd go do it. She thanked me. For a moment I felt that she was pretty friendly, but then remembered: 1) she is Katie's friend and will ALWAYS side with her; 2) they have this "shifty" and "sly" thing going on, so despite their small and soft appearance, they are not stupid and try to manipulate their way through things. Like the other day, I saw them talking to Imad in his room. What reason do they have to talk to him?? It seems like they are just sucking up. And the fact that they went there together shows they must've discussed their plans beforehand.

Anyway, back to the point. Although I felt embarassed that she and Katie (who was there but for obvious reasons didn't approach me with Yoshi) had caught me with my music as it had just started playing Buffalo Bill (which has that woman screaming as she is being skinned at the beginning), it could've been a lot worse, like, say, you snooping around her room, not hearing them come in and then have Katie stand at the doorway asking "ummm...what are you doing?" That's one way to get fired. And it'd be a shame too, because you seem to be doing pretty well and most people (the ones that matter anyway) like you.

Oh, and after I ate with Jim, we walked to the train station and bumped into Thai, who asked me if I was going to the movies. I had gotten Brain's message, but didn't really want to go, but now that Thai had asked me in person I felt obliged to go.

I got a bit depressed after parting with Jim, so when I went back to the office to change, I actually started doing some work. Mind you, it was like 9:30pm or something. The only thing that stopped me was a missing document which I had to request. Grrr.

Semi-day off tomorrow

Handed in my 12th brief today, so I had met my quota and felt like I could tank it for the rest of the day (rest of this month actually).

I went for a jog and gym at lunch. Got sooo motivated because I watched the 'Break to Build' Michael Jordan commercial in the morning. I went to KFC in the end to get some popcorn chicken for my rice back in the office.

While I was preparing my food, Imad came and spoke to me "cryptically" and said Wendy would tell me more. I was curious. When I was eating in my office, Wendy came and spoke to me about it. She said she needed someone to drive a barista to Toronto tomorrow, and asked if I could do it. Given that: 1) last time when I joked in a way which she interpreted as a 'no' and never asked again; and 2) I really have nothing else to do, I eagerly said yes - multiple times. Hehe, I felt like going for a cruise anyway. I didn't mention that I liked street racing, lol.

I began thinking about how strange it all was - why would you need a lawyer to be a chauffeur? Why not just get some admin guy to do it? Maybe they want me out of the office? But why? Had Katie lodged a complaint? If so, what had I done wrong? Not talk to her?? And if so, why do they need me out of the whole building? Doesn't she just go see someone in private?

I figured Alanna may have had something to do with it, since she knows I've done my 12 and was free, but when I told her she was surprised, and said I didn't sign up to be a chauffeur. I appreciated her understanding, but I wanted to do it.

So I organised to get the car keys, and when I went up to level 26, the fire alarm went off, and I had to walk down fucking 26 levels of stairs. I got so dizzy I thought I was gonna faint.

I found my group of people outside the bank, and they said everyone had been looking for me, lol. I told them I had to walk 26 flights of stairs, and I didn't get the car keys. Grrr.

When everything resumed to normal, I had a chat with Karina, and she asked me how many briefs I had done. She changed her mind a few times before wanting to know. I told her 12, and she said (in a disappointed tone) good work. She had only done 4. Hmmm. I suggested we could sit down and talk about our ways of doing one, and she said something about doing it over lunch. Hmmm.

At 5pm, I felt like getting some snacks to share around, so I went out. I saw Katie and Yoshi at the lifts. Fark. I didn't say anything. When the lifts arrived, a lady was inside, and it seems like she had met Katie and Yoshi during the fire drill, as they started talking. It actually hurt me to hear her voice.

When we got to the ground floor, I held the doors open and waited for them to go out first. Katie seemed surprised, and I felt like she looked up at me as she walked past.

I went to get those little character men, and took them back to the office to give to Zena and Livak. Karina and Gonaz didn't want one.

I had to stay back till 7ish because Darrell came up with this great plan to put Livak's stuff in the car, so I had to wait for her to finish her files. I was in my office listening to Eminem and working, which I really enjoyed. Earlier Zena had come in and offered me some chips she had gotten. Ever since I started giving things out, I've mentally noted who returns the favour: Genie today gave me a pack of Malteasers, Therese offered me some of her M&Ms, the admin ladies near me always give me some of their snacks.

I was pretty excited driving the company car home, and showed it off to my parents, hehe. They liked it as well. My mom doesn't seem to understand that we can't just buy it at a discount from the company.

Nurse lady sighting

Took my time getting to work today, just because I felt like it. I still got there at 8:30am.

I had lunch with Stanley today, my shout because he got the last one. We went to the Japanese restaurant near my office. I actually wasn't looking forward to it, because I felt like it interrupted my routine of going for a run or going to the gym, but it actually wasn't that bad. He asked me if I was out meeting girls, and when I said no he suggested that I volunteer for his concert to meet girls that way. At first I thought it was a good idea, but then I have a feeling he has an ulterior motive to get me involved with the triads. So I backed myself off that idea.

We went to check our Rebel after lunch because I need a new basketball. I saw Katie and Yoshi just as we were going down the escalator.

I finished my 11th brief today and got started on my 12th. Late in the afternoon I went out to get those little sweet pastry things that looks like a character, but they didn't have any so I bought a box of chocolates. I gave some out to people at work. I find that the admin ladies close to me really appreciate it. Lisa just seems like she'll eat anything.

I gave one to Karina and had a chat with her. I dropped one off at Rat's desk and managed to do only that without stopping for a 10 minute conversation. I gave one to Alanna when I asked her a couple of questions. She ate it right away, lol. I thought she'd be a bit reluctant because of the calories.

She later came to my room to talk about a matter, and had rested her face in her palm in a way that seemed like she was trying to hide something. I had this suspicion that maybe the chocolate had some sort of special effect?

Late in the day, I went to the photocopy room to get a print out and heard footsteps walking out. I thought it would be Kim, and started smiling. But it was Katie. She looked at me defensively, and I could understand why Emma had said something about Katie, but I just dismissed it as her being nervous and not knowing how to act around me given what has happened.

Rat came into my office to ask for my opinion about her matter, but I reckon she just wanted a chat. She kept it short though, probably because we saw the boss walk past, lol.

I grabbed my gym bag and caught the bus home. When I got onto the bus, the only seat left was one near the back. As I walked towards the back, who do I see? None other than nurse lady. We made very brief eye contact before I turned around to sit in front of her. I was stoic for the whole trip. I knew we'd get off at the same stop and intended to get up first so she wouldn't think I was following her. But just as I started making movement to get up, she quickly went ahead of me, cutting me off.

I wonder if it was her way of trying to get my attention, or her way of ignoring me in return. In any case, I noticed some pimples on the left side of her face, and also the lack of ring on her wedding finger. Guess things aren't so dandy for her.

I went to the gym tonight, my arms are soooo tired. I've been doing curls everyday since like Sunday or Saturday? Fuck. I went to get petrol and enjoyed the drive.

Meet Joe Black - returned

Man, yesterday all I had to do was given Rat one piece of paper, and I got caught up in a 10 minute chat with her. I saw that she was eating her lunch, and I knocked on her door thinking I could just place it on her desk and go, and she starts telling me about how she can do the matter now because her other matter will go away. I was thinking "ummm...your lunch is gonna go cold", lol.

Today I had Macca's for breakfast when I got into the city. Karina came into my office to tell me about her hearing yesterday. I had started to toy with a bit of my skin sticking out on my thumb before she came in, but found myself continuing on with it as she talked. But at the same time, I thought to myself, "if she was Katie, you'd hardly be doing that; instead, you'd live and die on every word she was saying". Hmmm.

I worked until about 11:30ish and then went out to get an imported Kit Kat and gave half to Karina when I went back to the office.

At close to 1pm I got changed and ran to the gym, quickly did my arms and continued running up to where the bball courts were. I did this last week as well (sans the gym) and that time I decided to explore my way back, getting myself trapped in a dead end. But you know what? It made me think: you will find yourself in dead ends, or closed doors in life, but just turn around and keep going. Katie was a dead end, so just go another path. There are millions of paths.

Anyway, I jogged back and bought some bread rolls to go with my soup back in the office. I noticed Meet Joe Black had been placed in my in-tray. Part of me thought it was good that she at least still thought about me, but I quickly slapped that me in the face and took it as a sign that everything was over. It was kinda like when a couple breaks up and they return eachother's things. Oh well.

Katie actually came to work late today, maybe because she was searching for the DVD? Or maybe she had a long sex romp with her boyfriend? Don't speculate. So to make up for it, she stayed till close to 6:30pm, all the while I kept my door shut, with hers open, just so I could show her that I had moved on.

I went home at 7pm, was the last to leave. I felt like doing something. I had planned to go watch Date Night, but then didn't feel like it. I also thought about seeing Nabi, but then didn't want to waste so much money, and I also wanted to see if she'd get me a little present next time I saw her on a Saturday (when she'd know I'd come). I went home, got the car and went to rent a movie. I rented something, then went for a drive. On the way home, I raced this Asian guy in a red sports car for a bit from the lights. Although it was short, I found myself feeling much more satisfied than moments ago. Maybe this was the kinda thrill I was after?

Did yesterday really happen?

Did yesterday really happen?

I went to the courts and did my jump rope as usual, then went to the gym, then went into work. I worked for about an hour (and NOTE: I did NOT go into Katie's office or feel the need to), then went home to get the car. I drove my dad to Chinksford and then went to the Wick to get some chocolate strawberries and then went to see Naby.

The rumours going around about this place is that some drunken idiot "had a go" at one of the girls, hence why the police were called, so I feel a bit safer.

I gave Naby the chcocolate strawberries. Unlike Jenny/Emily, she just said thanks without really checking them out, whereas Jenny/Emily shared it with me.

In the back of my mind I know everything done by her is because I pay for it, which makes me feel a bit more comfortable in the sense that I have no expectations that any of this is 'real' or 'true'. But I do feel, mainly by her body language, that we are getting somewhat closer. Last week it was holding me and continuously kissing me. This time there was a lot of tongue, holding me, and putting her legs around and on top of me as we laid there.

In the space of an hour we managed to have sex twice and have her get me a drink in the middle of it. I would've been content to just hold her and drift off to sleep after the first time.

After that I stupidly went to the casino. I lost $900. I guess a loss was coming, since I had left with a win every other time. It's how it works. I should know better. So today, I woke up with the "did I really lose $900 yesterday?" feeling.

Yes I did.

And I know I've said this a million times before, but I need to kick the habit. I'm quitting. I've figured out the only way to make more money is to work harder and get a promotion.

Speaking of which, you know what I noticed a few days ago? I was checking the organisational hierarchy, and I am on the same level as Katie and Yoshi. Now, I don't think anyone sees us as being on the same level, because it's fucking obvious I have more experience than them, but to see that we're on the same level really pissed me off. What pissed me off more was to see other people higher than me who have less experience. This just gave me more motivation to reach 13 this month.

Oh, and last night I had a dream I was playing a game of bball. It was part of the Chinese comp, but it was outdoors. It was a special event or something. Some guy got on a fastbreak and I chased him down. I had him down on lock, and he softened as he went for the lay-up. I had it. I could see a swat coming. I jumped up after him but mis-timed my swipe, and although I got a bit of the ball, enough to hit it away, I didn't get the massive swat I wanted and fouled him as well.

On Friday Karina came into my office and held out three rolls of lollies for me to choose from. I chose the fruity pastelles and she gave me the whole roll.

I spent the day half working on Monday's file for court and half doing another brief, which I managed to finish and put into Alanna's cabinet - my 8th. I'm on target to get 12 by the end of next week and 13 by the end of the month.

At lunch I went to pick up my suit. I decided that the "buy 2 get 1 free" shirt deal at Myer was too good to pass up, and I needed to get a present for my mom si I stopped off at Myer first. I bought two blue shirts and one white one, then got a $138 fragrance package for my mom.

I then went to pick up the suit. I didn't have time to try it on so I didn't. On my way back to the office I grabbed some Macca's. I went back to the office and ate my lunch, then opened up the cabinet with the mirror inside and tried on the jacket of my new suit. It looked great, I loved it :)

As I was taking it off, Katie and Yoshi walked past, and Katie looked at me taking the jacket off.

Near the end of the day we crossed paths walking along the corridor. I just put my head down and didn't say anything.

I also gave the quotation diary present to Deone for his departure, but didn't go to his drinks. I had to stay back at work to wait for a fax which never came, and Karina stayed back because she has a hearing on Monday.

She had sent a big fax (which was probably why my one didn't come through), and we spent a bit of time talking at the fax machine. We were the only ones in the office. I realised afterwards that what I had wanted to happen with Katie was happening with Karina - the reciprocating lolly thing, the staying back and talking thing.

Sixth brief...

While doing my usual net surfing while eating breakfast, I saw that Claire had added me on facebook. See? Just goes to prove my theory that if you ignore girls long enough, they'll come back to you. That's my plan with Katie.

I got to work just before 8am again, and got started on things pretty much straight away. At one point I went to ask Zena a question about the informant she had the other day (because she was hot), and then she complimented me on my haircut and guessed it was a number three, lol.

I also went to ask Therese a question and she was twirling her hair as she was talking to me. I was leaning against the side of her desk, and I saw Alanna walk past. I hope she didn't think I was hitting on Therese.

I also found out on the calendar that Katie has been given her first hearing for next month. I wonder how she feels. For a while I thought about the idea of offering her help closer to the date, but then figured I shouldn't, as I didn't want to come off as desperate. If she asks, I'll help.

Part of me hopes she has a terrible time and shits herself, but if anyone asked, I'd say she was a good lawyer and was ready for it and would do a good job.

I went to the gym at lunch, and while I was running bumped into Pinnochio! We talked for a bit before I said I had to go, and then in hindsight thought maybe I should've asked for his number, so I sent him a facebook message later on asking him to lunch cause he also works in the city.

I ran back to the shopping centre near my office and bought some chicken for the rice I was going to prepare. Maria and I joked about 'Chef Therese' as I was making it. I could tell Therese enjoyed the attention, especially seeing she's the only one in the para area since Grace is on leave.

In the afternoon, Karina came into my office and said she had just come back from court, so was going out for a coke and asked if I wanted anything. I said I'd go for a walk with her, since I'd been wanting to go out anyway. We went to Hungry Jack's because she likes their coke, and then I went to buy a frozen yoghurt, and offered her some.

Turk also came into my room at one point, clanking her nails against my door playfully. I don't know what she wanted, because when I asked her what was up she didn't have much to say, but we just had a bit of a chat about the quotes up on my cabinets. Apparently she was thinking of doing something similar, and she said she collects quotes as well.

Later in the afternoon, I went to wash my apple and on my way back saw Rat talking to Katie outside her room. Rat said something about me, and I was too far away to hear, so when I got closer I asked her what she was talking about and glanced at Katie, who just stood there. I walked past her room and stood near my door and Rat and I began talking. I find that Rat can keep going on and on even though I just nod and smile.

I stayed till about 7:20pm, finishing off a brief. That's my sixth thus far this month, but on the record it'll be my fifth because I've had to suspend one, grrrr.

I was happy with my hard work, and felt like doing something, so ended up going to the casino. I withdrew $400 and lost it fairly quickly. I withdrew $500 and went to a table with a dealer who looked like he didn't take his job very seriously and was a bit too talkative - bad choice.

I nearly lost it all, but managed to stay around the $500 bankroll. I was there for a while hovering around that mark, and then there was a change of dealer, and I soon found myself up a bit. I managed to crawl my way to a $100 gain and cashed in and left.

It took me one and a half hour to make $100, and a lot of stress. But at least I didn't walk out with a $900 loss.

The shaved head

Unbeknownst to me, I got to work just before 8am today, and for a short time it was just Yoshi and I. She definitely saw me with my shaved head walk into the office as she was walking in the corridor.

It's funny how some people are too scared to say anything. I said hello to Lisa who just said hello back. I could've been wearing a pink flock around my neck and she wouldn't of said anything. Neither did Rat or Alanna, or Turk. Karina said nice hair cut. Wendy said she would like to do it too, lol. Therese said nice hair cut.

In the morning as I was walking to the kitchen, I passed Sharyn and Imad. I said good morning to them both as I walked past Yoshi's room, and Katie was sitting inside. She saw my shaved head and we held eye contact. It was kinda like that first time that NTM saw me with a shaved head, but not as explicit.

At lunch I went to the gym, but a different one this time, just to see if it was closer. I think it's about the same distance, but it was definitely bigger and not as packed.

When I went back to the office I had soup with bread, yumm.

I got to see that Gosha chick today cause I had to give her a file. She said "thanks [insert name here]" as I left, hehe. It was as if she said it just to say my name, or maybe I'm paranoid again.

I worked pretty hard today, handed in my 4th for marking and got halfway through my 5th. I'm pretty determined to make 13 this month.

In the afternoon I went to buy an apple and a pack of Kit Kat as well. I shared half with Karina, but Lisa walked in and I offered her one. I didn't think she'd take it but she did, lol.

Heath came in for a short chat just before he left. I think he's stressed about doing the list tomorrow. He handed me an email I had printed out, and then went on a rant about the informant who sent it to me, lol. I was cracking up so hard it was like I was in a comedy club, haha.

I worked till close to 7pm, went to check on Karina and we chatted for a bit before she suggested leaving together. We went around to let Zena know, and we all had a bit of a chat about how hard it was to make 12. Found out that they both took pay cuts to come here - Karina like $10,000 and Zena like $16,000. Fark, and I thought I took a pay cut.

I walked Karina to the train station as we talked about our cats. I went to get a bacon cheeseburger from Macca's and then walked to that shop to check out the suit I'm gonna get this Friday. I admired it on the mannequin from the outside because they were closed. Damn it looks so good on the mannequin. I bet you it won't look as good on me.

I have a headache now, I think I worked a bit too much today.

The comeback talk with Mike

I got up pretty early in the morning, didn't see a point in going to the courts since I was meeting up with Mike for bball, so I thought I'd go to the gym, but they didn't open until 9am. So I was left with either casino or work: I chose work. It's just nagging me that I have this file unfinished.

I drove to the office at about 7am and worked until 8am, left to get some Macca's for breakfast and then drove to Mike's place.

I got there early, and so cleaned the inside of my car for a bit and polished that bit of the car I hit with a log while up in Lismore. I called him and he said he could be ready in five minutes.

He soon came out, and I walked towards him and we greeted eachother. It was sooo good to see him, and I never thought I'd ever feel that way about him. I guess we've just been through too many battles together, so we'll always have that special bond. We also seem to be the only two left from the original team.

We drove to the courts which were about 10 minutes away. It was a nice court next to a playground full of children, the surface was a bit funny, and the court was smaller than normal, but it would do for a catch up shoot around slash chat.

We shot around while talking about the upcoming season. I told him I wasn't sure if I was ready or not. Physically I was at 80% and it was probably the best I was ever going to get, but it's the fear of landing on someone's foot and tearing the rest of my ligament off that was scaring me.

He talked about his own rehab for his knee and how it had gotten stronger but that he hadn't played for a long time. We talked about the proposed team, and it sounded alright, but I wanted at least two more players to make a team of eight so I wouldn't have to play that much. We'd play in division 4 so that put my mind to rest a bit.

I thought about proposing a game of one on one but decided against it, thinking maybe it was too early for anything like that, but he asked so I said yes. I beat him in the first game, we rested, and I beat him in the second game. I relied mainly on my jump shot (yes! I've still got it!) and some left handed lay ups.

After that we went to the cafe nearby and I bought us some ice chocolates. He told me about how some company was chasing his mom for money for an investment that went wrong, and said something about his mom not handling stress very well and getting violent. I was kinda glad that he could open up to me about that, as I too could understand his concerns about his mother. I did, however, think he must've handled it better than me.

I drove him back home, then I went home to leave the car for my dad. I had a shower then met up with Malay for lunch. I was surprised to see him sitting in Gurang's car near his house. I got in and we drove to the Bra. I don't mind Gurang, but I find him a bit too confrontational.

We got there and while waiting for G and Shuing, checked out the shops. G and Shuing arrived a while later, and then we went to an Asian restaurant G suggested. Shuing talked about poker the previous night at Bobby's place, and said two things noteworthy to me: 1) Ele asked him about me and Bobby; and 2) Michelle and Bobby went out for a long long time, maybe for an hour, and when asked why they took so long, Bob (who is a bad liar) said the traffic was bad, even though they walked.

I found Gurang to be a bit weird as he put his earphones on at one stage to listen to his ipod.

After that we drove to the shopping centre near me because I wanted to check out the sports stores for the soccer jersey. I couldn't find it, and we had coffee instead. Gurang and Shuing seemed to get into a bit of an argument, which was awkward for the rest of us. We parted after that, and Shuing drove G and me home.

I read on an internet forum earlier that the brothel Nabi works in was sealed off by police. I got a little scared, as I could imagine the police coming to my door because they had seen me on CCTV and also noting my mobile calling that place. Fuck! How could I be so stupid to call from my own phone?? Not that what I do is illegal, but that shop must've done something, and now I'm affiliated with it. Grrr.

My dad wanted to watch 2012 so I went out to rent it, and drove past the brothel to see. Nothing wrong with it, although there was a later post on the forum that said the police had left.

Shaved head x 4?

I went into work this morning just to grab my fitness first bag because it had my sneakers in it, then went to the courts. I did the jump rope exercises and then went home to have a shower, then went to the Wick for a haircut.

I was pretty intent on shaving my head. I think seeing NTM with that guy really pushed it over the line. I had been contemplating it for a while now. I had mentally set on having a number three, but on the bus trip there I was of the reasoning "well if you're going to have it done, might as well get a number one". When I got there and it was my turn, I just said number three without thinking, and so off my hair went. As always, it looks pretty fucking bad when only half your head is shaved. I had a little bit of regret afterwards because I didn't look like the guy NTM was with, but as I walked on the streets I was kinda proud of it. It really accentuates my chest and body.

I think this is the fourth time I have done it?

I went home again to have a shower, then caught the bus to work. I worked from about 11am to 1pm, and emailed Evissa back and forth a bit about Twish. I got a bit of work done, and to my disappointment, I went into Katie's room again. Ironically, I have this fear that she has a camera in her room. Of course, if you knew, why go in??

I am still at a loss as to why she now keeps her door half open/closed. If she doesn't want me to look in, then just close it altogether. If you don't want me to walk in, then you'd only leave it slightly ajar. But then I noticed Turk did the same thing.

I left and went to that shop with the $250 suit. It was a bit uncomfortable walking in as the three people there were just standing around talking, and only the lady seemed welcoming. I said I was interested in the grey suit in the display, and she had me try on a different suit just for size. She found one my size fairly quickly and I went into the change room to try the pants on.

When I came out she pinned the area which needed to be altered and asked if it was ok. I asked to try on the grey one and she said they didn't have it in my size but that it'd be brought in, hence why she was just having me try on suits for size first, but she did give me a bigger version of the grey one to see the design, and it looked alright so I took it.

I went back into the change room to change back, and when I came out I noticed she had the two free shirts on the counter. I was surprised about two things: 1) I thought I'd get to pick the shirts; and 2) she had my size 38 right there.

About the choosing, that didn't bother me as much because there was a white one (you can't go wrong with white, and I have an obsession with white shirts anyway) and a grey/brown striped one, which looked alright anyway. I asked her how she knew I was size 38 and she said it was her job, and that she could tell by just looking at my body and chest. I wonder if she thought I worked out. I was pretty amazed at her skill.

On the bus ride back, with the two shirts in hand, I thought that it'd be good to marry someone like that - they could do all my clothes shopping for me with complete accuracy.

I went home and got the car and went to see Nabi. I thought about going to the casino, but told myself I didn't need to. My winnings last night paid for the suit, and I'd pay for this from my savings, so I was back to even in the state of things.

I made a booking for 3pm and stopped in the city to buy a pineapple kiss for her.

I got there pretty much at 3pm and waited a bit for her to get changed as she had just started her shift. She recognised me and we went up to the room. Sex took a bit longer than I would've liked, but oh well. She seems to really enjoy it, I can't tell if she's faking it (I can tell when others are).

In the heat of the moment, we kissed. I knew it was coming. We came close a few times, and just kissed eachother on the chin, cheek and nose, but then we finally met lip to lip. We did it a few times as well.

Afterwards, I held her as we talked. We held hands and she would keep kissing me on the cheek and neck. She smoked a bit, but I don't think it was an entire cigarette. She told me she was going to Melbourne from Monday to Thursday, and I joked that I'd then come to this place on those days.

I actually really enjoyed holding her and laying there. I still felt a little awkward seeing she was still a stranger. I wondered if this was what it was like for Katie and her boyfriend. If it was, wouldn't it get boring after a year or two?

Her alarm went off and she went to shower. The buzzer went off and then I showered. I gave her the pineapple kiss just before we walked out. She kissed me on the lips.

I went home, got changed and washed my car. It is damn beautiful.

The failed Twish reunion

Went to the supermarket near work in the morning to get an apple and some corn kernels for lunch, then got into the office and started the day off by reading a case.

I spent half the day amending stuff and the other half trying to get started on a new brief. At about 12:30ish I was thinking of going to the gym at 1pm, when Heath walked in and asked if I wanted to go for a walk. I said yes, but sounded hesitant, and he picked it up. I then admitted I was planning on going to the gym but that I could walk part way there with him, and he said ok.

So I got changed and we headed off. When we got downstairs I saw Katie approach the lifts buttons and ignored her. We were about to walk past when Rat called out to me to tell me about her case with Hodges. So she started talking to me about it while I was standing there in my gym gear. I couldn't help but take the opportunity to reach behind me and in the process flex my arms a bit.

Heath started talking to Katie, and although I tried to avoid looking at her, I stole a glance once or twice and I could tell she was nervous and just pretending to listen to Heath.

Rat was telling me about how she and Katie were in the lift with Hodges, and another lawyer asked how he went at Livvy (referring to my case), and Hodges said that the other guy (me) made good subs!

Haha!

I kinda wanted confirmation to know whether Katie had heard about my win, but I guess that just confirmed it.

When we finally got to go, we headed towards the upper part of the city and we talked/joked about the boss. He mentioned a few of the bosses who weren't very nice people, and I kept looking around to see if someone we knew would be listening.

We parted ways later on and I had to rush at the gym, and it was super annoying to have a girl place her water bottle on the benchpress I wanted to use. But I improvised and did push ups instead. I guess that's what I like about the gym - you can always make do with something else.

I ran back and bumped into PL on the way, had a small chat and continued back to my office. I got changed and made lunch, and talked to Alanna as she cut up her grape fruit. She was telling me how it was the fruit with the lowest calories, and then we got talking about the gym and she said there was a closer one but I said that was full of gay people, and she said "it's better to be looked over than over looked". Hmmm.

She came into my office at one point to give me back a file for amending, and said that was three for the week so I was on track. I was about to say "game on" but then changed my mind. That line has been in my mind since yesterday when I saw that comparison table.

In the afternoon I went out and bought some mini-muffins. I offered one to Alanna and she didn't take it because of calories, which I knew. I gave one to Rat. She declined at first, and I was happy not to press it, but then she said she hadn't had lunch, so I stepped forward and placed it on her desk and she started eating it. See?

I gave some to the admin ladies in the area next to me, walked past Yoshi's room and saw Katie and Yoshi talking. They obviously saw I had food to go around, and I decided to skip them. I gave one to Turk and Zena. I offered Driver one but she declined. I also gave one to Heath.

During the day, at one point I was walking back to my room and heard foot steps running towards me. Therese caught up to me, and I looked at her. She looked at me and and we both shared a laugh.

I worked for the rest of the time and then ate my apple at around 5:20ish. I couldn't help but check the status thing and saw Katie was still in. I never heard her leave but apparently she left at 5:30. I left soon after that, not being able to concentrate anymore.

I was supposed to go to Twish's drinks but planned to get there at 8pm, so I went to the casino. I withdrew $400, won $280 and cashed out. I still had plenty of time so just walked around. I saw this Asian guy, probably about my age or younger, at the $10 table playing with hundred dollar chips. He'd bet $500 on red and $30 on zero. He did that like three times and it came out black. Then he pulled out $1000 chips and bet on red, and it came out black. On one spin, he changed from red to black, and it came out red.

I seriously thought this guy was going to turn around and punch someone. In a few minutes, he had lost the total amount of my credit card debt. Probably more.

I walked around a bit more before finally heading off. I bought a cheeseburger on the way and it was soooo delish! I went to where I thought the bar was, couldn't find it and walked to the other side of the wharf. I went to the bar where Twish had her birthday drinks and asked the security guard where it was, and he pointed me back in the direction where I had come from, so I walked all the way back there again, and this time found it. I just hadn't gone far enough the first time.

There was a lot of people. I didn't really feel like seeing Twish, especially in a loud environment where you could barely hear and where I didn't know anyone else. I went down to the bar area, walked around once, couldn't find her, then left. That was good enough for me.

I sat at the quay side for a bit before walking back to the bus stop and going home. On the way I saw a grey suit for $250. It came with two pairs of trousers and two shirts. Seeing NTM with that guy in a grey suit has really made me feel like a wardrobe change. Maybe people are getting tired of my black suits?

The ghost of NTM

I woke up with a pretty bad headache yesterday, don't know why. Got to work around 8ish, saw that Yoshi had gotten there about 7:20am, which I thought was crazy. Maybe she's trying to step up her game. I noticed Katie came in just after 8:30am, because I was facing the outside working when I saw her and Yoshi walk past. Call me crazy but I swear at the last moment before she went out of sight, she took a look past Yoshi into my room. Turns out she went to watch Rat in court, hence why she came so early. I kinda want her to come her usual 9:30 time because I want to beat her in number of files done per month.

I did some solid work until about 10:30ish when I went out to get that vegetable flavoured Kit Kat, and came back to give it to Karina. I had seen her in my photocopying room earlier photocopying a brief, and Heath was in there at the same time. I think he was a bit bothered by the fact that she was using our photocopier since she usually uses the other one.

We had a bit of a joke about me using her as a guinea pig when I gave it to her.

I worked a bit more until 12:30 when I went to the gym. I ran there, did my stuff, and jogged back. I changed back into my work clothes, and prepared my lunch. While I was in the kitchen, Therese came by and commented on the rice thing, and I noticed Katie walk into the kitchen. Therese had walked out and it was all silent. I assumed Katie had left.

Then I heard her say "sorry, can I just grab a fork" and realised she had been standing behind me in those moments of silence. I stepped aside and apologised quietly as she got a fork from the drawer. We made brief eye contact and I felt like that was really the first time I had seen her in ages. I maybe even felt like I missed her.

I did a bit more work before going early to the 2:30 meeting. I wanted to get there early because I wanted to sit on the boss' right. I have this theory that that would make him subconsciously think I was his right hand man.

So I was the first one there, and then bloody Katie and Yoshi enter, making it awkward. I smiled at Yoshi then sat down, and then they sat down. At first they were a bit quiet, and then they started talking quietly amongst themselves. Then the boss came in and said the meeting was supposed to be on level 8 but no one was notified.

I went to get Karina but she said she had to go to the toilet first, so I went to get Heath and we went together. Katie and Yoshi were sitting at the end of the table, and Heath and I sat at the other end. When the boss came in, he ended up sitting at Yoshi's end, so that they were now at the head of the table and I was at the end! Grrr.

Heath and I moved up a bit so he was now next to Katie. I heard him joke about their tea.

The meeting was ok. I chuckled at times when no one else did, which made me feel a bit like an idiot and also made me think that everyone else was a bore. I found the lights were too dark and it annoyed me, until Zena was brave enough to go adjust them. She got them wrong at first, then fixed them up. I looked at Katie and I saw a real look of hatred on her face. I was surprised.

After the meeting we had an afternoon tea for Deonious, Dugon and Tim (and Libby but she wasn't there). I spent the entire time talking to Heath, and then Deonious. I was glad he acknowledged my SLA experience, hehe. Rat was next to Deonious talking to Alanna about her matter, and I saw that Katie and Yoshi had approached to listen.

We talked for a while before splitting up to go back to work. I had my apple while staring out at my view, and then finished my brief. Despite my incredible headache that had been weighing on me all day, I still managed to run to the gym and do a brief in one day. Damnit.

I noticed Katie stayed until like 5:55pm, with her door open. I had mine closed for most of the time. This time she left via the closest exit to her. I wonder if she was seeing if I'd approach, or if she now felt safe to stay without Yoshi. Damnit, I kinda wanted her to leave with Yoshi because, again, I didn't want her to have time to work.

I left at about 6:20pm, having had enough, and decided to go look for that long sleeve soccer jersey with a collar. While I was waiting to cross the road, this cute girl stopped close by and looked at me and we made eye contact. Moments later she looked at me again, and then one more time. It was getting to the point where I thought I should say something. But then I got a tap on my shoulder and realised it was Kylie, so the girl had been watching Kylie. At least I wasn't paranoid about her looking at me.

We walked a bit up the city together, just chatting, and I told her about my speed dating thing since we had nothing else to talk about. While waiting at the next lights, I swear, I SWEAR I saw NTM walk by. She looked exactly like she did in uni, and not like the one I had seen in the bar a few years ago. She was followed by this good looking, tall guy with closely cropped hair and a grey suit. Wow. They looked like a celebrity couple.

I parted with Kylie as I went to Myer, with NTM on my mind. I bought a white shirt as they were having a sale. I went around a few sports stores and couldn't find what I was looking for, and then went home. I had dinner with the family and couldn't wait to get to sleep because of the headache. I've realised it can be pretty hard to sleep here with the tv and lights on all the time.

Props

I got to work before 8:30am even though my intentions were to get there late, seeing as I felt tired from yesterday.

I went to see Alanna in the morning and she asked me how it went. I said there was no prima, and her face changed. She said "you're kidding" and I said I was. She said not to do that again because her blood froze, lol. She was so happy that I'd won she ran out to tell Wendy, only to have me tell her I told Wendy last night.

We had a talk about it, and she was so excited, because we all hate that defence lawyer. She kept congratulating me and then we talked a bit about other work and then I left.

I went to the bank at around 11:30 and by the time I came back it was time for the newbie lunch I had organised. We all went except Zena, apparently she was sick today.

We went to the dumpling restaurant, and it was cool to just sit together and eat. Lewis sat on the booth side with Carina and Turk, and I sat with Dugon on the other side.

We ordered our stuff and talked about work over lunch. We gossiped about the boss' unreasonable take on people talking, and Turk said the boss had told her three times not to talk to Tim whenever he goes to talk to her, lol.

Also found out Carina had been on a few dates with guys from rsvp. She was pretty bad at using chop sticks, and at one stage I offered to help, so I took her chop sticks and got the dumpling for her. I wonder if anyone thought anything of it.

We talked about our hearing experiences so far, and I made everyone laugh when I swore about the file I had gotten which was supposed to be done by a supervisor (the hearing yesterday).

We finished pretty much within the hour and when the bill came I put in more than I should've, and since Turk was paying by card, it meant she didn't have to pay anything because what had been paid was already enough.

As we walked back, Carina stopped everyone for a "survey". She asked about "the two girls", referring to Katie and Yoshi, and asked if they ignored the others. She said they had always ignored her whenever she said hi but finally managed to get a response. Either Turk or Dugon said something about Katie which implied she was a bit snobby. I could sense the female competition dynamics going on here. I wonder if Katie ignoring Carina had anything to do with me.

I tried to resist defaming them. I said they were pretty close friends. I said I had known them from the trial, and that Karina shouldn't feel bad because they probably feel like we took their jobs. Turk said it wasn't our fault, and I said yeah, but I empathised with them.

I don't know, but after that, it put a whole new spin on things about Katie. Maybe she wasn't as good a person as I thought she was? Maybe she was a bit bitchy? Maybe her being close to Yoshi wasn't just due to friendship, but also wanting to exclude others?

I wonder what they would think if they found out I had tried to go for Katie.

As we walked down the stairs, I said not to worry, because we were the "real" LO1's, lol.

We found it funny going back to the office together because it was like almost taboo to have gone out to lunch together, lol.

I worked the rest of the day, or at least tried to. On a few occasions I got caught in a conversation with Rat. She is sooooooo talkative. I wouldn't say long winded because she is kinda interesting, but she just talks for soooo long. If she wasn't married I would've interpreted this as a sign.

I walked past the boss at one stage and he mentioned my win from yesterday, lol.

I had a file review with Alanna, and she said I had a really good reputation at the moment, that I was the top of all the new people, but that different people become flavour of the month all the time. It made me feel good, but part of me knew it wasn't going to last. How can I keep out-doing myself??

She showed me this table thing which shows how many files everyone has done for each month, and I saw that Katie was actually quite productive. On a couple of occasions she exceeded the minimum. Alanna said someone had whispered in their ear that if they did then they'd get an LO1 job. I was a bit jealous, but then again, it wasn't really hard to get the minimum if you didn't have to go to court. Now that they're LO1s, we'll see how they handle it.

When I got back to my office, my competitive juices ran like crazy.

It's on!!!

I wanted to exceed the minimum this month, no matter what.

I noticed Katie had her door closed in the afternoon around 5pm. I wondered why, and then realised that Yoshi had gone home. I hope she didn't do it because she thought I was going to approach, because I wasn't. That was quite a pompous assumption. I closed my door as well. I noticed that when she left, she walked across my room to leave, but the thing is, she normally doesn't. She has an exit right in front of her and usually uses that door.

A bit later I went out to buy this soccer jersey thing. It's like my basketball jersey but long sleeve. I can't find one with a collar so I settled for this one. It looks really nice.

I left work at about 6:40pm, went home, then went to the gym wearing my new soccer jersey thing. It is sooooo cool! After gym, I came home and had dinner with the family.

My first conviction as CDDP

On Sunday morning I went to the courts for a shoot around and then went into work for a bit. Then I met up with Malay for lunch, picking G up and having pies at the Bra. I wanted to introduce them to pies with potato and gravy, hehe.

We sat and talked for a while, watching everyone approach the shopping centre doors only to find it was closed. Shuing had said earlier he'd meet up with us after having lunch, so I suggested we rent a movie and go to his house to watch it. We met with Shuing at the Wick, and he was a bit annoyed because I told him to meet us at the video store but on the way there we stopped for ice cream and then decided to walk towards our high school.

Anyway, he drove to where we were and we started walking to the school when it started pouring rain, so he dorve us back to my car and we went to the video store.

It was a bit hard looking for a move that suited Shuing's taste, since he wasn't into action/gore at all. I found this movie called Idiocracy or something, and thought it looked good so we all settled on that. Malay was having a ball at the ex-rentals section, trying to gather five movies so he could get the $20 deal. He asked us to pick a movie each, and I picked The Grizzly Man.

When he went to pay for them, the hot blonde chick looked at The Grizzly Man and made a flirty comment about how she was sad that it was being bought. For a few moments thereafter I got jealous because I felt that it was my movie so I should've gotten the 'credit' for it, but then realised she probably found Malay attractive and would made the comment about any other movie, and then I felt happy for him.

We bought some snacks at an Asian grocery store nearby and ended up going to G's house to watch Idiocracy. It started out ok, but pretty soon it was obvious it was like a C-grade movie. It had its laughs, but ultimately Shuing said it was the worst movie he'd ever seen. I agree it was bad, but I still say Deathproof was the worst movie ever.

We tried to watch a bit of The Man, but it skipped due to scratches on the disc so we called it a night.

Yesterday morning I went to the courts and had a lot of fun. I didn't make myself do any drills in particular, but just had fun trying to jump as high as I could with the ball and basically trying to dunk. I think I can get pretty high, but nowhere near the ability to dunk.

I actually had a few good laughs and fun moments to myself as I just did whatever felt good on the court. It was times like this that I really appreciated the peace and quiet.

After that I went to the gym, then bought a sushi and went home. I caught the bus everywhere because dad had come home and I gave the car back. It was alright, but on my way out to work I had forgotten my pass so I had to go back home which was a waste of time.

When I did finally get into work, I saw Levac there, preparing for her hearing. We had a bit of a chat, and I think we were both a bit surprised at how one another looked in casual gear.

I worked for a couple of hours and then went to the Pepper place for lunch, then had a bit of a walk around looking for that long sleeve jersey I saw a guy at my gym wearing, which I thought was a good idea if I needed to go to the gym when it rained.

I went back to the office and worked until about 7pm preparing for my hearing. I found a lot of problems in it, but just told myself to wing it.

Had dinner with the whole family, it was good to be a whole again.

Today I didn't have a very good start to the day. I had to bring the kitty litter up from the car, but the packaging broke and it started spilling everywhere. Grrr. Then I had to bring the bag of rice up which was bloody heavy and I had already gotten dressed.

I drove to court and got there pretty early, so went to the shopping centre to use the bathroom, then walked back to my car. I saw Zena on my way to the car, had a brief chat before I had to go get my suitcase from the car. We met again outside court and talked, before one of the witnesses approached me and I started talking to him.

I eventually went into court and after a chat with my informant, we started almost straight away, unlike last time.

I felt pretty nervous but seemed like I was on auto-pilot. Half of me couldn't believe I was into my second hearing, but that half was too busy to do anything.

I got annoyed when the defence guy xx my informant, because everything he asked was irrelevant, and he went on and on about it. I had two other witnesses to get through and here he was wasting time.

At morning tea I went to look for Zena but couldn't find her, and later found out her matter had folded so I guess she went back to the office.

We continued after morning tea until lunch. I didn't go out to lunch, opting instead to stay in the building and prepare my closing and xx in case the defendant gave evidence.

Even after lunch, the defence was still xx my informant, and I got so restless I started sighing loudly, lol. We got through the next two witnesses fairly quickly, and I don't think we even needed them.

The defendant didn't end up giving evidence, and during closing I made an extra effort to put the pieces together and go really hard at it. I needed this. I knew I needed a win.

The judge sat on the bench for 45 minutes writing out his decision, so we all sat there in silence.

Please tell me you're not dumb enough to fall for this guy's smoke and mirrors.

Man, if I win...

Then the judge finally read out his reasons. The sweetest words I'd heard for a long time were "inescapable that she offended..."

YES!!!

He believed me!! I'd won!!!

I couldn't help but let out a little smile as I sat there listening to the rest of the judgment. I didn't really push on sentence because I figured I'd done enough.

I left the court rather quickly, got my car and drove off. I had my Eminem music on pretty loud because I was so happy. I stopped at Bankstown to get some Vietnamese rolls for whoever might be left in the office.

By the time I got back, I caught Wendy just as she was leaving. She asked how it went and when I told her, she was pretty ecstatic and we had a bit of a talk about the defence lawyer.

I left soon after she did, and then drove off to get some pizza for the family as I was so happy. These guys stopped next to me at the lights and said Eminem was awesome, lol.

Nabi

Yesterday I went to the courts and worked on my jump shot a bit. I made myself hit 20 shots from my favourite elbow angle. I think I've wrinkled out my fear of landing on my right knee on a jump shot. I can feel it coming back to me.

After that I went to the gym. I could see the new tan on my arms, and I must admit in the most humble way, they look pretty good. I went back home and had oats for breakfast, then drove out to work.

I worked for about two hours. At first I didn't feel the need to check out Katie's room, but I ended up doing it. I found out the name of her boyfriend on a rental lease. Things I've noted:

- why does it seem like she is taking care of all the bills?
- they had a place together last year, so she had a boyfriend during the trial when she kept looking at me...

I tried looking the guy up on facebook, and then realised I could just see him from her contacts now that I knew his name. But he wasn't on her list. This made me think that maybe he's some old guy who is too old for technology like facebook. Maybe she's getting tired of being with an old guy? Either way, it was quite disgusting to think about it.

I drove to the casino and withdrew $400. I was up like $260 at one stage, then lost it all bar $200. I used the two $100 chips to play dozens and columns and ended up with a gain of $200. Having seen the devil for the day, I quickly left and went to that place that John firts took us to.

They only had one girl working by the name of Vivian. She looked like she didn't want to work, and it showed in her introduction. I asked to wait, and so sat around for about 15 minutes. I was shown two girls, one who seemed to have a similar attitude, and another who seemed slightly less hostile. It's one of those places run by intimidating gangsters, so I wasn't really prepared to waste their time and not pick a girl, so I went with the second girl.

Her name was Nabi. She was a bit taller than me without heels. I didn't find her that attractive at first, but she started being friendly slowly and so she grew on me a bit. I was actually looking forward more to the after sex part than the actual sex. So much so that during sex I kept telling myself to hurry up so we'd have more time afterwards to lie down and talk (I booked for an hour).

After about half an hour we finally laid side by side and talked. As per usual, they didn't seem to reveal much about themselves (or maybe I just didn't know how to ask) except that they worked a lot. We did get some good conversation going when she told me that for a while all she ate was fast food like Hungry Jack's.

I also asked her if she had a boyfriend in Korea and she said she used to, and that a year after breaking up she was sad, and two years after breaking up she was still sad, but three years after it was not as sad.

The difference between her and Cindy was she kept on touching me as we talked. But as body language showed, she still wasn't feeling as close to me as she could be because I noticed how far her hips were from mine. But that's understandable, given that we had just met.

After her cigarette, she flipped over and grabbed my keys and started playing with the die, and we talked a bit about gambling. Being the hypocrite that I am, I told her to stay away from the casinos.

I couldn't help but feel that maybe there was a bit of a connection there, at least more so than Cindy. Maybe I'll go back. I think I do this just for the hope of an emotional attachment rather than the actual sex.

After that I drove to Chinksford where I went to the drive-thru and got a small cheeseburger meal and consumed it on the side of the road before going home to have dinner.

Clash of the Titans

On Thursday morning I was waiting at the bus stop and saw this hot blonde waiting for the bus. She stood quite far from me, but I could tell she was hot. She was definitely the hottest girl there, I was sure all guys were eyeing her.

When the bus came, I got on, and the blonde got on the same bus. When she sat down I realised it was Jacqui - Twish's friend. I remember seeing her once on the bus and she smiled at me as I got off but it was too quick and I got off before I could react.

I sat on the other side of the aisle and smiled at her. She smiled. I said "you're Jacqui right?" and she said "yeah, where do I know you from?" and we started talking. She was pretty stunning, albeit with the help of make up. I reckon the people behind us were thinking "this Asian guy has guts to chat up a girl like this". A small part of me was hopeful until she mentioned wanting to move out with her boyfriend, but I was also relieved and grateful that she mentioned it early on instead of giving me false hope. I was still pretty happy just to be able to talk to someone this hot, and in the back of my mind told myself to keep her as a connection because she may have hot friends.

We talked on the bus and found out that we're in the same building. She actually lives a few suburbs away but drives to my bus stop and leaves her car at her friend's place then catches the bus to work.

When we got off the bus we talked pretty easily as we walked to work. I was glad that she went for a coffee instead of going to the lifts with me, because I felt like I had done everything perfect so far and was afraid that more time spent with her would mean more opportunities to stuff up.

The day had a Friday feel to it, mainly because it was the last day before the easter holiday, and also because it was the first day of the month, which meant the stress of the last day of the month had gone by.

I prepped for my hearing and then had a telephone conference with my witness. This thing is going to be disaster. I had gone to Levac earlier to talk to her about it since it was really her matter, but she gave me 20 minutes of nothingness. Heath came in at one stage just for a chat, and when I told him about my matter and who it had come from, he closed the door and said Levac was famous for dishing off files and went on leave too many times. He helped me with the matter a bit, which I appreciated.

I went to sushi train near the cinemas for lunch, and even though I thought I was really hungry, I didn't end up eating that much.

After lunch and back at the office, I spoke to Rat about my hearing because Alanna wasn't in, and even she said it shouldn't have been given to me because it was too hard. Oh well. I like a challenge. She was a bit more helpful.

Just before that I spent a bit of time in Turk's room and Turk, Karina and I laughed at Turk's horror driving stories. I was glad Katie walked past a few times because I wanted to show that I had other friends in the office.

At the end of the day I grew restless and went to talk to Karina for a while. We started off talking about cars, and then somehow got talking about private health insurance which led to me telling her about my knee. She actually showed genuine concern. I'd like to think she was just being courteously concerned, but maybe it went a bit beyond that? It was just the questions she was asking me which showed some degree of interest. As we talked, I was mentally comparing her reaction to Twish's "can you walk?" response.

I left work shortly after that, and just before I left I put up another quote in my office - the assume one. I hope Katie doesn't read it thinking that it refers to what happened. I just thought it would be a good lesson to remember.

I went home and then went to the casino. I was up $100 but then ended up losing $400. Felt like shit. I wanted to see Cindy but when I called I was told it was her day off. I drove around a bit and ended up going to that place that John took us to once in the North. I saw a girl called Daisy (or 'Purple' in Korean) who seemed a bit weird and a bit too happy.

Thinking about the speed dating thing, I'm surprised I'm not upset, angry or depressed about the lack of mutual matches. Maybe it was because I didn't find anyone there I liked anyway. Or maybe I tend to have a 'crush' on girls first before liking them. Think about it - NTM, CLE and Katie all started off as 'non-communication' crushes. The only exception I guess is Ele.

Yesterday morning I went to the courts and did jump rope and the HIT runs. I then went home and got changed for the beach. I met Malay at his bus stop and we caught a bus out to the city then to Bondy. I told him about speed dating and Ele getting married.

We got to the beach and waited for G and Brain and Scope. We decided to get something to eat at Macca's. I bought us ten nuggets and we shared them while talking about the stick insect my cat found at home, lol.

G came after we finished and the three of us sat outside on the street seats waiting for Brain and Scope. I couldn't believe how G was dressed. He had a polo shirt on, jeans, and a round hat with 'Australia' on the front. Far out, I felt a bit embarassed to be with him.

We talked about a lot of things, and then decided to check out the markets which had just set up a few metres from us. Malay and G were really interested in rings and bracelets. I was more interested in these little black studs. I absolutely loved the black diamond earrings Michael Jordan wore on Oprah, and have been fantasising about getting them myself, but I am not sure if I can bear the pain of getting my ears pierced.

Brain and Scope finally arrived like nearly two hours after the designated meeting time, and I couldn't help but have a bit of a go at Brain. Malay and I had been talking about how indecisive he is, and he didn't fail to show how right we were. He asked if we were hungry and I said we just had nuggets and G had already eaten at home, but Scope said he was hungry so we told them to get something. Brain just looked around, unsure what to get, unsure whether he should eat, only because no one else really was going to eat.

FUCKING HELL. JUST GO EAT!!!

Even when Scope went to get Hungry Jack's, Brain still stood around waiting on some direction on what he should do. It took a bit of encouragement from Malay and I to shoo him off to Hungry Jack's.

We sat at the seats close to the sand while they ate their stuff, and then went down to the sands and set up camp right next to the life savers. It didn't take us long before Brain, Malay and I were in the water. Despite the length of time that has passed since our last visit, I felt a bit more comfortable in the water. It was like my body was ready to get red eyes and drink salty sea water.

After a while Malay and I decided to get out of the water and grab an Easyway, so we went across the road to get it and then returned. After some sitting down and talking, we found out Shuing was going to join us. He was supposed to come, but cancelled in the morning. I just don't think he's a morning person.

Brain, Malay and I went to the toilets and when we came out we saw Shuing, with G looking for him. We made our way back to camp and talked for a bit before Malay and I went back into the water. We tried to make our way as far out as possible, but on like the fourth go I drank too much sea water and that was it for me.

We packed up pretty much when the life savers did, and we went to change in the change room. While waiting for Malay, this Korean guy asked Shuing if he had a light, and we told him our friend (Malay) did, if he wanted to wait. Shuing started talking to him, and then after Malay had given him a light, the guy asked Shuing for his facebook contact, lol, because he wanted a friend here while visiting Sydney.

We went to a pizza place across the road from the beach for lunch, and ordered four pizzas to share. After that we decided to go home and meet up again for a movie. Most of us wanted to watch Clash of the Titans, but Shuing seemed reluctant because of the inherent violence.

We all went our separate ways home. Malay, G and I caught the bus and it was kinda quiet as we were all pretty sleepy and tired. G went to Malay's place or Thai's place, while I went home to change and have a shower. Shuing messaged me cancelling on the movies. Malay reckons it was to resolve the car issue, but I think he just didn't want to watch the movie.

I picked up Malay and G from Thai's place, and then picked up Scope and Brain. We went to Broadway and got our tickets early, then bummed around in the arcade next door. G and I played two games of air hockey and I won them both, which goes towards some degree of evening out my earlier arm wrestling loss to him during pizza.

The cinema actually filled out, and we were lucky to go in early and get good seats. Brain annoyed me by reaching into my popcorn and rummaging his hand all through it before grabbing a handful. Even in reaching for popcorn he was indecisive.

The movie was pretty good. I really liked it, and I'm starting to like Sam Worthington. I like the story of Zeus and that, I thought they should've made a movie about it ages ago. That Gemma Arterton girl is pretty hot in a strange, plain way. I just wished they would've picked someone really pretty to play Medusa.

After the movie I drove everyone home, and I was glad to get some sleep after a long day at the beach.