Drinks with Thai and Brain

Wednesday
On Wednesday for Mike's team we played Machinas. We won rather easily. One of their guys told me they didn't want to win because they didn't want to end up in Division 1, so I'm not sure how genuine the victory was. I told Mike that if we won there'd be a chance we could end up in Division 1, and he was rather willy nilly about it as expected. Luckily for him, we are now in Division 2 after the split.

Thursday
On Thursday night we played The Rock. They were a rather small-ish team of Asians with one quick guard. We managed to lead for most of the game. With about 10 minutes to go, we were up by 14, and I was on the bench with Isaac and A. I was thinking about going on - I mean, could I really bust a 14 point lead?

In the next five minutes they caught up and now we were tied. Isaac said we should go on, so we did, but he also told A to go on. I got the ball and found an open lane, driving towards the hoop for what seemed like an easy lay up, only to clank it. Down the other end, they missed a shot, A got the rebound and then PASSED IT TO THE OTHER TEAM!

I got pretty annoyed because that's not the first time he has done that. And then to add to that, he deliberately falls down in a 'struggle' for the ball, as if to show he's trying hard, but all he's doing is taking himself out of the play. They took a last second jump shot. Alex Z went for the block, and I ran towards the guy but didn't want to foul him so kept my hands to myself and my feet on the ground.

The guy hit the shot.

We just had a total collapse and meltdown with a 14 point lead.

Despite how angry I was, a small part inside me told me that maybe this was the perfect 'loss'. We are now one step further away from making it into Division 3, and if you had to lose a game on purpose, you'd lose it with as small a margin as possible. So...mission accomplished?

Friday
On Friday I stayed back at work until 6ish. I then went to the gym and had another one of those 'massive' workouts where I did arms and chest on top of the usual bike and abs. My arms were so tired. After that I met up with Malay to pick up the rope ladder he got for me from Eastbay, we had a bit of a chat and agreed to meet the next day for jogging.

I then went home and spent the night playing Last of Us online against others.

Saturday
Met up with Malay at 6:30am for jogging. We did one lap of the park, walked a bit back to the street and then continued running till we got up the hill. I always seem to underestimate how hard that hill is. When I'm sitting at home, I think it's rather easy, but when I'm actually trudging my way up there on my last legs, it is so friggin' hard.

My plan was to go to the courts after that, but I got lazy and just stayed home playing Last of Us online. I reasoned with myself that I needed to rest my knee for the next day's game anyway.

I had a nap, and then met up with Thai in the city. He wanted to meet up for a drink, so I assumed he had something he wanted to talk about. Brain arrived shortly after, and he was the only one who hadn't eaten, so we decided to get dinner. Thai tried to encourage him to pick a place to eat, and he just didn't know, and in the end merely accepted a suggestion from Thai to go to Pepper Lunch.

The one on the main street was closed, so I led them to the one near Chinatown. For some reason walking through the city reminded me of Erica. Hmmm.

When we got to the restaurant, I thought about getting something small to eat, but in the end everything seemed like a full on mean so I just had a drink. I wasn't hungry, and I wanted to save some money.

I asked them what they thought we should do for Malay's birthday. We got talking about traveling around the world. Brain said he wanted to go but none of us did, and I said I might go at the end of this year and invited him to come along, although he has been to the US before. This led to us talking about how much info to put on our fb profile. I told him he could map out all the places he has been to, he said he didn't want to, and I said it would be a good conversation starter for girls. He just said he didn't like sharing that much info.

I was eager to see what Thai wanted to talk about, but thought we better leave it till later when he gets some alcohol into his system. So I just brought up some mundane topics, and when they finished eating we headed off.

Thai led us to this bar underneath KFC in the city. We took a table in the corner and I got the first round of drinks, Thai got the second round and Brain got the last round. We talked about a lot of things - girls, money and life. I think I really got Thai to open up when I asked them how they would rate their lives right now our of 10. Thai gave 5/10, and Brain gave 5 or 6 out of ten.

Thai said he rated it five because he felt like there were so many things he could be doing out there, rather than just being a husband, father and worker. One example was being a monk for a few weeks, as required by his religion. He wasn't complaining about his marriage or child, but he said he just had a really open mind to do a lot of other things. He also revealed to us that when he proposed to his wife's parents, he told them that he didn't have a job. He added that his wife annoys him everytime she brings up how independent she was before they married and how he lived with his parents until they married.

This obviously got us talking about living at home vs being independent. We came to the conclusion that most girls want 'independent' guys, even though that was unfair when for someone like me, I am wanting to save money and looking after the family's financial affairs.

We also talked a bit about ghosts, and Brain revealed that after his father passed away, a few weeks later while he was sleeping at his auntie's, he felt a hand touch his forehead and his brother also told him that night he had a dream about their dad. Thai told us how his bathroom door sometimes automatically opens by itself.

A while into our talks, I glanced over to my left where I saw two girls sitting there with drinks. I made direct, but brief, eye contact with a girl with short cut blonde hair. I immediately thought it looked like Natalie, but didn't think much else of it. I mean, what were the odds, right?

After we finished our drinks, we went for a coffee. It was my shout, and we talked some more, before finishing up after 10pm. When I checked my phone on my way home, Natalie asked if I was at the bar, so it turns out that was her! Damn, what a coincidence.

Today
We played Los Pollos today. I got to the game early for a shoot around. We'd be missing Jim and One, so it'd mean there'd be only three guards in the rotation - me, MJ and Isaac.

Despite trying to pump myself up before the game by reading Relentless and listening to 'Push It', I started the game feeling a bit lethargic, especially when we were down 0-9 in the beginning. Then we started to catch up slowly and tied the game at 9-9.

The game also started getting physical and a bit touchy, as they were trash talking us. I got a loose ball and was trying to run it up the court, but some guy fell a split second earlier trying to get the loose ball, and in a last feeble attempt, he tried to grab my ankle instead of the ball. I passed it off and thought about standing over him, but told myself not to.

At the end of the first half, one of their bench players was trying to drive baseline, but I slapped the ball away. He tried to retrieve it, and the buzzer sounded but he managed to shove me in the chest with his off arm. I walked up to him and said "hey don't push man". I was staring him in the eyes, and was expecting a confrontation, but he just roughly said "accident bro" and then I walked away to my bench.

At halftime MJ was saying to everyone to keep their cool. I knew he was right, but something inside me wanted to lash out at the other team and start a fight.

So the earlier incident had gotten me riled up a bit. I started the second half on the bench, and started questioning whether I even had the guts to go on. I guess a part of me was afraid. I kept telling myself "see how you feel right now? Try to grab it, hold it, and savour the feeling". It worked a little bit, but another part of me wanted to just stay on the bench. MJ signalled for me to come on at 15 minutes, so that was the decision made for me.

When I went back on, I decided to be the aggressor and pressed them a bit when they were taking the ball up, only to have them get scared and pass it off. They went up by five points, and then thanks to some nifty team defence, we caught up. Isaac got a crucial intercept which led to an easy lay up. I made a silly foul when some guy drove right at me and I took a swipe at the ball, fouling him and sending us into the penalty.

The game was tied when Mike tried to go for a Carter-esque intercept, and being a lot slower than Carter, arrived at the opponent a lot later and ended up stumbling into him, sending them to the line. That also got him fouled out.

We managed to get a three point lead. They went for a three in the corner. The ball bounced off the back rim and high up into the air. I was the only one anywhere near where the ball was coming down. I jumped up, grabbed it with both hands and buried it inside myself before being fouled.

Four seconds left.

I knew hitting at least one free throw would seal the game. I felt nervous as fuck as I headed to the line. Memories of missing two free throws in a previous game came to mind. Now a lot of people were standing around watching, mainly to wait for their game after ours.

I swished the first. Then I swished the second.

They called a time out. I headed to the bench and mumbled "mother fuckers". They ran a play for a three, which missed and we escaped with a win. When we went to shake hands, one of them was like "see you in the finals". Dumb cunt.

Earlier in the game, I had told myself that if we won, I'd reward myself by not having to go to the gym. But I went anyway. Winning that game meant that would give the other team extra motivation to get better. And I didn't want to laze around while someone gained progress over me.

So after vacuuming the house, I walked to the gym and had a massive work out. I did some grocery shopping and then walked home.

Luna 3rd strike / catch up with John and library guy

On Sunday, I noticed in Kakaotalk that a new friend by the name of 'Amy' popped up. I was scratching my brains to figure out who it was, and even posted a status update on my fb asking "who the hell is Amy?"

It was like I had some vague memory of meeting an Amy a while ago, but could not put a face to the name. Was it a working girl? When did I get a working girl's number??

A while later, it clicked - it was the girl I met at the Korean meet up. I was in the "eh, whatever" mood so I messaged her saying "wow Amy, looks like you got a new phone!" (because she previously said she couldn't get Kakao due to her old phone). I was expecting a "who the fuck are you?" reaction, but we messaged back and forth sporadically before I finally settled into bed that night and we were frantically messaging each other almost every second.

She turned out to be a really chatty person, and said she was now taking the Korean Beginners 2 course. I asked if the teacher was Luna and she said no. She asked if I had heard about Luna, and I said no? She said "working holiday" and "can't stay at the same place for more than 6 months".

Ohhhhhhh...

She said Luna was working somewhere like Hurstville now. So that at least removed my presumptuous assumption that she was in the city and able to do lunch if she really wanted to. I guess there was some credit to her claim of being busy.

I ended up asking Amy out to lunch (purely with the intention as a friend, and to seek out more info about Luna), but she said she would be in training for the next two weeks so couldn't make it. She convinced me it wasn't an excuse as she said that Min guy asked her out as well and she couldn't go because of training.

I had to finally say goodnight as my arm was getting tired of holding up my phone.

Yesterday at work while I was out at lunch, after dropping off my dry cleaning, I messaged Luna:

"Free for lunch this week? :p"

I suddenly felt a swarm of happiness all over. I felt like a little girl having a crush, and would've tightened up and squirmed my body in the middle of the city if I could. I wasn't expecting an instant reply, hell, given her history of responding, I wasn't expecting a reply within days, but I was just happy. In fact, I probably would've been more happy if she didn't respond. Why? Because it would keep my fantasy going. If that 'no' never came, it would keep my hopes alive. So I started checking my phone hoping there wouldn't be a response.

After work I went home and drove to library guy's place. He walked out carrying his baby, and invited me inside. I greeted his wife and the baby. He invited me to hold her and I was too scared I'd drop her so refused. After a brief moment we left to meet John in Burwood. By his own admission, John was early for once, and now seemed to be impatiently waiting for us even though we were on time.

After parking, we thought we went into the right restaurant and library guy went to use the bathroom. Before sitting down, I called John and said I was there but couldn't see him. He said he was there, and then I realised we went to 177 instead of 117 - der. So I walked out and cracked out laughing when library guy came out, saying they probably thought we did that just so he could use the bathroom LOL!

We eventually found the right restaurant and found John sitting alone in a booth. I'm always surprised by how 'flash' he looks. Not sure if it's his hair or clothing. We all had hot pot which was really unique because you got your own little hot pot instead of sharing one big one like it's traditionally done.

We caught up a bit, and found out John's wife is pregnant and due to give birth next month. That probably wasn't that surprising given it was about time. But my real reason for organising the meet up was to 'declare' I was going out on my own soon, either to the bar or my own firm, and I wanted to open up my connections.

Instead, it turned into a semi-lecture of the difficulties of running your own business. I appreciated the tips, and took them to heart. One thing that hit me was they said you needed to be the type of person willing to ask for money, because a lot of people out there try to get away with not paying. The other main point they wanted to hit me with was cash flow - you had to manage it because you never knew when the next sale was coming. You could make $5,000 in a month and nothing the next. John said if I could stay in a job that paid $70-80k then I should do it, and that I'd be lucky to clear $5,000 per month (ie. have in the pocket).

But I countered by asking, if he could turn back time, he would've done the same thing and he said yes, so I guess there's the real answer.

John suggested 'dessert' and I thought he meant ice cream or yoghurt, but he meant whoring, or a massage place. I didn't really want to go because I needed to save money, but managed to use library guy as an excuse. He didn't want to go, so I said I didn't want to leave him by himself.

Even as we walked to a coffee place afterwards, library guy said we could go and he'd wait for us. I said "nah, one for all and all for one", then John joked "yeah, or I could go by myself after fucking you guys off" lol.

So we ended up in this cafe on the main road, and one of the main topics we talked about was whoring. Library guy said he couldn't do it anymore because he had a daughter and was afraid of karma. That really struck me because I had never thought of that. John said he didn't see it as an obstacle and wondered if it would change when his daughter was born. He also said he got mad at his wife for a month for having a girl instead of a boy.

We also talked about luxury cars, and John told us the story of a taxi hitting his BMW and all the trouble he had to go through to get it fixed with AAMI. Also learnt that everything was not as it appears, as he revealed all the financing done to drive these cars, whereas I always thought it was fully paid off.

We called it a night and John suggested we do this once a month, and library guy said he should settle into his new role as a father first, but John didn't seem to be too bothered by that. I drove library guy back home.

Today
Found out Mary's mother passed away during surgery, and immediately sent her a text. I even went to the office and with the help of Genie, signed the card for her and contributed for some flowers. After that I went for a walk with Genie.

I have spent the last two days listening to telephone calls, and am bored out of my mind. I am starting to wonder if they think I am dodgy and limiting the work I am doing? Or maybe Mob is treating me like a temporary and going easy on me? Or maybe there really just isn't that much work to do? Either way, I feel uneasy about being paid so much money for all this.

After work I went to the gym and had another massive session with benchpress, weights and squats on top of the usual bike and abs.

Luna still has not responded. I got curious earlier and looked her up using the new fb feature of graphs. I saw some old photos she was tagged in, including one where she was kissing a girl on the lips.

Could she be...a lesbian?

Ari / The Conjuring

On Friday I had decided to go punting either that night or the next day, and watch The Conjuring either that night or the next day as well. In the end, I decided I'd go watch The Conjuring first, and then go punting if I felt like it. If I didn't, I'd go the next day. One thing I had to keep in mind was waking up early the next day to jog with Malay.

But plans had to be altered as I was invited to work drinks with Ben, Wongy, Paul, Mob, Jen and Gabby. It went not as awkward as I thought it'd be. But there was one awkward moment when Mob had sort of just arrived and started talking to Gabby, Ben with Jen, and Paul with Wongy, when Paul and Wongy decided to go out for a cigarette. I was left by myself. I watched as Ben and Jen talked, and Mob and Gabby talked. Hmmm. Eventually Mob asked me where my old office was, and that got things reignited a bit.

I ended up talking to Paul and Wongy about golf. Apparently Paul had recently picked the sport up and is thinking about buying a set of clubs for $1000-$1500.

Ben was the first to leave, then Jen, then Mob. Then the rest of us all left at the same time. I caught the bus home, and figured I'd go punting, seeing as I was in my suit anyway (trying to impress) and I had missed the 6:10pm movie session anyway.

So I went home, put down my bag then drove out to Bibi's shop. I went in, saw the usual guy, found out Bibi is on "holiday", and Sammi was working later that night. I was shown about five girls, all of whom were mediocre, but ended up picking a girl called Ari.

She asked me how I was when we went into the room, which made me think initially that she wasn't shy, but then it was pretty quiet thereafter. After the shower, she did the usual kissing on the back, then DD, asked me to turn around and went down on me before getting on top of me. I sat up to kiss her breasts and then she asked me to get on top. We finished like that, and then laid down next to each other to talk.

She didn't seem very talkative espite my best efforts, but would ask me a question if things went quiet for too long. Found out:

- she has been here for about four months
- she is 24
- she has been to the harbour bridge, opera house, and zoo
- tonight was her last night of work before she goes on a holiday
- she works six days a week but doesn't have a consistent schedule
- she smokes and drinks a little (but didn't smoke after our session)
- she doesn't sing or dance
- she is ok with swimming, but doesn't like any games involving balls

Sometimes I'd ask her why (like why she had red nails on her right hand and peach nails on the other), and she'd say "I don't like why". Then when she asked why I shaved my head, I joked "I don't like why" before telling her.

She had tattoos on her lower tummy and lower back. I asked about them but didn't get much out of her. She asked me if I went to the shop often, and I joked everyday before saying last time I came was about two months ago. I asked if she had a boyfriend and she said no. I told her I had a Korean girlfriend but we broke up a while ago, and she said "Korean girls are sensitive".

I think I may have come off a bit too obvious in wanting more than a shop relationship, as I'd say an over amount of things like "we go bowling" or "you teach me swimming".

I was reading her palm at one stage and joked "you will have boyfriend soon" and she laughed. I stopped short of saying "that will be me".

When her buzzer went, we showered and got dressed. Maybe it's new standard operating procedure, but she didn't walk me down the stairs, instead staying in the room after saying goodbye to clean up.

I then drove to the shopping centre near me and made it just in time to watch The Conjuring. But there were a lot of people lining up, so I was lucky I made it to see all the trailers. I had a medium popcorn and Sprite, and plumped myself down in my row but in a seat not assigned to me. I couldn't be bothered going to the other end of the row, and was hoping the true owners of the seat wouldn't turn up. They did, but I heard a girl say "let's just sit somewhere else".

The movie was quite good, managed to scare me a good amount. The cinema got colder during the movie, and I was thinking "goddamn, is this supposed to be? Is there something next to me?" It also made me think "don't look in the rear view mirror when you drive home". One annoying thing about this cinema is that it attracts a lot of kids, so there were a lot of screaming teens in there.

After the movie I was indeed a bit scared driving home, and even brushing my teeth at home. I kept on thinking that horrible creature would turn up somewhere. It was late, so I quickly went to sleep.

Maybe I'm a bit older, or maybe it's whatever, but I kinda feel like the whole punting thing is a bit...aimless. I mean, I wanted to go see Bibi, because I had thought of seeing her regularly. But now I've seen two different girls in a row, and it's just not what I'm after. I think I'm not the type to sleep with different girls all the time, but I just want one girl. Even if it is whoring.

Saturday
Woke up at 6am to go jogging with Malay at 6:30am. Had a bit of diarrhea before leaving, but all good after. He seemed to have a problem as we stopped twice for a bathroom break for him. We did one lap, I had my knee pad so it seemed ok, but I still don't know how I'm going to do the City 2 Surf.

He said he wanted to do some hill training, so while he was in the bathroom I got the idea of taking him to Barker Street - the steep hill I used to sprint up when I was in high school. So after we finished, we were walking and before turning to my house, I was like "hey I'll take you to a place, but don't stop before I do" and he was like ok. So we jogged along the main road and he thought I wanted to go to Macca's lol. Then when we passed it, he realised.

We both managed to do it, but it was harder than I thought. I can't believe I used to sprint up this hill!

But when we got up there, it felt good just like in the past. There is a bit of a view, so it makes you feel like you've achieved something.

We rested at the top of the hill for a while before walking back home.

I was gonna get lazy and spend the rest of the day playing video games, but Jim said he wanted to come to the city to get some comics and asked if I wanted to go for a shoot around, so we went to the courts near me.

I got there first and ended up playing half court with some guys. One of the guys, Tim, said he sees me walk to work everyday and recognised my shorts. We all ended up playing a full court game, and I wanted to go full blast to win the game but was conscious I had a game the next day.

Then Jim drove us out to the city, where we went to Kinokuniya. He looked at his comics and I read a finance book for a bit before following him around the comic section. After that we went to the sushi train on the level below, where I told him I had decided to ask Luna out one more time, and he seemed to be ok with it. I said this time I'd do it the night before to make it seem more casual.

After that he said he felt like a cake so we went to get coffee at the TGV food court. It was my shout, seeing I got the change from the sushi train, he had shouted me before and he was going to drive me home (petrol has gone up to $1.70 lately!).

He told me this story about how one of his brothers decided to fart on them as a prank, but instead did it on his dad, and he was laughing so much he could barely tell the story.

So yeah, he drove me home and then I spent the rest of the day playing video games. I finished The Last of Us! Now to master the online game lol.

Today
We had an early game, so I left home at just after 8am and drove out there. Isaac was already there and we played around the world. I won, and he had to do ten burpees as punishment.

I thought I would be in pretty good shooting shape given the warm up, but my main focus leading up to this had been to stop their main player, who averages like 16ppg. But I never did 'x' him, as we played zone and then switched to a 3-2 zone. During a time out in the first half, Jim said to switch to 3-2 and MJ said to do something else, Jim got angry and walked off. I really didn't like that. It's not like MJ said anything personal, it's just strategy, and we don't have time to tread carefully on the feelings of others.

We were down by five at the half, but then they pulled away a bit and we found ourselves down by ten. But we managed to catch up and tie the game later on. I hit one jump shot, but missed four free throws. The most crucial came towards the end when we were down by five. I drove it and was fouled by one of their girls. If I had hit both, it'd only be a three point game.

If we play them again, I will need to 'x' their main guy, who likes to drive, and sometimes dish to a girl who can shoot. Their center with the tatts can't really score, but provides a good inside presence.

Bert was lacking sleep and it showed, as he was slow in getting back on D, and had like five shots roll in and out.

After the game I spoke with Alex, his girlfriend and Jim outside. I wanted the whole team outside but Mike, MJ and Bert stayed inside. That really annoys me.

We were waiting for the free food, but Alex and his girlfriend couldn't wait, and they didn't like congee anyway. Although she is attractive, I realised instantly that personality/attitude can be an instant turn off. She is the type who doesn't like eating this, doesn't like eating that, whereas I'm kinda like, be lucky there's food, so eat it.

Anyway, I went back in and spoke to MJ and Bert in the lobby as MJ's nieces played around us. MJ told me Mike complained to him after the game about not getting the ball enough. I was annoyed at that, because it's another "me" issue. Why does everyone have to be so selfish? Why is the problem always about them and not the team? If you can't get the ball from a pass, how about getting it yourself, either from a rebound or a steal?

Why don't people ask "what can I bring to the team when the ball is not in my hands?" That is the ultimate question.

MJ said he didn't like playing with One as he yells at everyone. He said he was here to have fun and not to be yelled at. I told him I was thinking of taking a break next season but wanted the team to stay intact so I could come back to it. He said he wouldn't play if I wasn't there, as One would then think it was his team, whereas right now it's still my team and I know how to talk to people. I told him maybe I'll stop playing weeknights.

We managed to get some food, and I even found Mike and Mark in the courts and dragged them to come to the lobby. But we weren't together for that long, as Bert soon left, and then MJ left. I stayed to speak to Mike a bit, and then left as I got bored.

I was still angry about the game. Their main player scored 21 points, so all I could think of was the number '21'. I decided I'd go to the gym. So I went home, used the bathroom, jumped on the net a bit, and then went to the Wick. I donated one suit - the one with blue stripes.

I then went to the gym, and decided I'd do a massive workout. In addition to the bike, abs and chin ups, I did the bench press, curls and push ups where I'd crawl across the area as I did them. My arms were so tired after that.

I was tempted to get KFC but resisted. I went to Coles to do a bit of shopping before going home.

Lunch with Rom / DC

Yesterday I had lunch with Rom, met her at my building and we ended up going to a sushi place near me which I had passed thousands of times but never went in. I noticed a pretty waitress there, so maybe I should go there more often.

Anyway, I thought conversation went surprisingly well, given that I find Rom to be a tidbit annoying and we have vastly different interests. We started off talking about how she was looking after Hayley's new firm while she was away on an overseas holiday, and I learnt that the new 'office' is just one of those 'fly-in/fly-out' ones where you basically pay for receptionist services and a room for conferences if you need it. I should've known, because I was wondering how she'd have enough money to start a firm.

I also got the feeling Rom was trying to hint that Hayley's boyfriend (now fiancee I guess, since he proposed before they left for the holiday) was a bit shonky, mainly because he went straight to the bar and has no experience. I wonder how he could afford a ring and a holiday. Maybe it's all debt.

We didn't talk that much about my work, thankfully because I am always concerned about the secrecy of it. We did talk about my future though, and she suggested I go to the bar after my contract finishes, and coincidentally right at that very moment, I had dipped my sushi into too much wasabi and it swallowed it, causing an intense inflammation of my nostrils and consequent choking. She (understandably) thought I was choking because of her suggestion, and I had to try to stop myself from laughing at the pure timeliness of it.

Also talked about other people, including Tran who is apparently in Sydney and wanted to meet up on Friday night. I kinda wanna be by myself on Friday night, so told Rom I had to go out to Livvy with some friends, and she said she was similarly unavailable, but did suggest re-scheduling Tran for another night or even lunch.

I shouted lunch, mainly because I was at the cash register first and she seemed to be stuck behind some people, but also because I figured she might not be earning much, and it was my time anyway.

After work I went to the gym as usual, but this time decided to put in more work and bench pressed and did curls. I was so sore, and then reminded myself that this was what I used to do at all my other gym sessions.

Today
I don't think I am over Luna yet. I had a dream where I was either teaching or learning English from this Indian guy, and we were travelling around town together. Then Luna called, and it seemed like I stole her business, and she said something like "are you sure you want to learn English? It's hard, there's an exercise where you have to pretend to go to court to speak" and I told her that it was ok because I normally go to court anyway.

At lunch I met up with DC for lunch. I went to his building and sat down on a white leathery couch to wait. I silently admired the couch and the whole atmosphere of the place. Rom yesterday suggested I could have my chambers here if I went to the bar, so naturally I started thinking/fantasising about how this could be my new office in a year's time. I touched the couch and thought it was expensive, and that whatever rent I paid would go in part to paying for this. In fact, everything here, all the nice things, I would pay for it. It wasn't as glamorous as it seemed now that I realised it.

I also thought about how I'd bring the guys in to check out my new office, and how they'd think it was so fancy, and only I'd know and worry about the amount of debt I'd be in.

I waited for a bit before he came down. He was dressed casually in a blue sweater and I asked him about it, he said he had no court today. He asked if it was cold outside because my hand was cold when we shook hands.

He suggested we go to yum cha at the Phoenix, so we headed there. It was so close to my office, and such a good idea, why hadn't I thought of it?

It was a bit quiet as we walked there, I kept thinking about leaving the 'substantive' conversation till we sat down, but he started asking me about the last girl I told him about (Kate) and I said she kept rescheduling so that was the end of that. He asked me if I was looking, and I said half half, and he asked why, I said I had better things to worry about like work because my contract ends in April. He half joked "time to go to the bar then" lol. I just thought it was funny the way he said it.

Anyway, at the restaurant we talked about mad magistrates, a bit about his work coming up. I tried to avoid talking about my work, but I think that was one of the reasons he wanted to see me (well, that and getting briefed). He seemed interested in what I learnt from my work, and I did let out a tidbit by saying I realised how many crims went to The Ivy, which he already knew.

We talked about others who had been involved in the trial as well, and he commented about how everyone in it had progressed (in the context of one guy SH being made a judge recently), and I thought maybe he was lamenting about his own career, even though I didn't think it was bad. We also talked about my old work place, and I felt more open about it as I was no longer there. Even he knew Imad had a thing for mixing girls with work.

Towards the end, I could tell we had been there for more than an hour, but I kinda didn't want to leave, it just seemed fun to hang out with him. I grabbed the bill and said I'd get it because it was his birthday a few days ago (12th), he was protesting loudly, I gave it to the waitress, but she came back with the bill when I had my back turned and he took it and paid for it. I only had $60 on me because it's the end of the pay cycle (get paid tomorrow) and thought that would be enough, but I saw he paid $70 and didn't wait for the change. Geez that would've been embarassing.

When we parted near my office, I saw I had been gone for almost 90 minutes, but luckily Mob wasn't in her office when I returned. In fact, she kinda left work early today, not sure why, but I stayed until 6pm. I've decided I'm going to try to put more hours in from now on. It's time to flick the 'on' switch. If only I could wake up earlier.

After gym tonight, I got home and saw I had received an SMS on my phone from someone not on my contacts. I immediately thought it was Luna asking me out to lunch (because I had deleted her number) but then saw it was from Giles, Trevor's brother. HUGE disappointment :(

A night at Thai's

Wednesday
On Wednesday I went to see Margy for my counselling session. She started by asking me if I had had any gambling urges, and I gave an honest answer, saying I hadn't even thought about it 99% of the time because I had been occupied with a girl, and the only time I did think about it was when I thought about this counselling session.

She asked me about the girl and I told her about Luna. We spent most of the session talking about it. She asked me what made me think she was interested, I said the touching in the class and her coming up to speak to me after dinner, and leaning into me. She seemed to suggest that Luna was just tipsy, I said that's possible but Korean girls can hold their soju.

Then I felt like she was giving me a lesson on what not to say on dates and that, and I could tell she got a bit 'squirmish' when it got a bit corny. I even told her about online dating and she said that's different, because that is a bit more 'interview like'. Anyway, we finished off the session with her giving me a weekly time table to fill out with activities to keep me busy.

On my way to bball, on Parra Rd near Ashfield, as I was passing the traffic lights, the speed camera/red light camera flashed, and I looked down at my odometer at that moment and saw it was 59km/h, so if I get a letter, I'mma fight it!

Thursday
On Thursday, we played The Crookes. At first it looked like we might not even have a game as they only had three guys, then one arrived and played with four, and we got a six point head start for them starting late. Then their fifth guy arrived, and they slowly started catching up, until by the middle of the second half they took the lead and basically blew us away.

They had one big guy, but it was their guard who was doing most of the damage, with some threes from the top.

After the game, I realised something: we just lost to a team who started with four, and we had a head start, and we weren't even angry. Hmmm.

Friday
After work, I went to the gym, then went home to get the car, and drove Malay and Brain to Thai's house for a night of video gaming. I had bought some stuff from Woolies, like Pringles and sushi (for Jenga). After we parked, we saw G arriving as well, and waited for him to park. I think we were all eager to see who this new girl of his was. When we saw her, it was dark, but it was enough to see that she wasn't very good looking. Despite that, she seemed kinda extroverted and had a bit of 'fun' in her step.

G arrived with some KFC, so we ate that while watching Taken 2, and then the pizza ordered by Thai arrived. Surprisingly we watched the whole movie, with some jokes made throughout, just mainly about how stupid it was to throw a grenade just to determine location.

After that we played Mortal Kombat for a bit. I paired up with Brain, Thai with Malay and G with his girl Evonne. I did most of the damage with Scorpion's "get over here" move, hehehe.

When I could see some were getting tired of that, I suggested we play Jenga. What kinda annoys me Malay has taken my "sushi with heaps of wasabi" idea and turned it into an "extremely hot chilli/disgusting sauce" idea. So what he and Thai did was to mix every sauce possible into one, and then put it on a sushi. Luckily I didn't lose that game.

Then the next game Thai said the loser had to eat a teaspoon of wasabi by itself, and Evonne lost, but swallowed it without chewing, so there was no visible effect. I said that's why it needs to be on a sushi, so it has to be chewed, and they seemed to finally accept my reasoning. Maybe lucky too, because I was the next to lose, although it wasn't that bad. For the last one, Thai really cleaned the spoon of wasabi on a sushi, and ironically, he was the one who lost. That one really got up his nose lol.

I suggested we play another video game, but Thai said he wanted to talk. That took me off guard a bit, and I thought it was a bit weird. So I joked "is this an intervention?" and Thai said yes. My immediate thought was "is this about my gambling? Do I deny it or admit it?"

Luckily it wasn't that at all. He really just wanted to talk. He said we're all old now and don't get the chance to talk much. So we ended up talking about our high school days until like 4am. I revealed my two biggest things - Rhino and me being laughed at during the YA program, which motivated me to go to the library.

Brain didn't reveal anything about himself, although when he was drunk he did seem a little more talkative. Thai revealed the second most, mainly talking about him punching other people in high school after they pissed him off lol. Then we talked about others, like monobrow, Sakaya etc.

I drove Malay and Brain home, and that obviously took me out for Saturday, so I spent most of the day sleeping and playing The Last of Us.

Today
I played Last of Us in the morning, then finally dragged my ass out to the courts for a bit of shooting around, and ended up playing a half court game until this fat guy injured his ankle. I went home after that, shaved my head, had a shower, and went out to the city to get a white long sleeve shirt to wear underneath my work shirt for work, since my office is freezing cold.

I got that from Giordana in Market City (hoping to bump into Luna), went to Coles to get some stuff, then went back home, where I played a bit more PS3 before leaving for the game.

We played 1337, and were only missing One. We got off to a bit of a lead, then really started blowing them away in the second half, and eventually more than doubled their score. I scored six points, and defended their little guy who was really quick and a very good dribbler.

After the game I went to eat with Jim in Flemington. I was careful not to bring up the possible trip to the US at the end of the year, as I wasn't sure if Fat Pat was going, so I didn't really want to commit myself. Also, I kinda couldn't bear the thought of spending $10k on a holiday when I know it could be used towards a deposit for a house, especially now that I'll have to pay for my tax return.

So we talked about girls, I told him about the end of Luna, he told me those two girls who initially thought he was old had gotten back to him although he wasn't going to do anything about it. After our meal we stood in the car park talking for a while, mainly about Bo and how Jim likes our Sunday team more, but Thursday team is still much better without Bo. I agreed with the latter - do you know how much non-trouble there is now that Bo is gone? It is so good to just be able to focus on basketball!

/Luna?

So I texted Luna last night asking her out to lunch this Friday. I knew I should've waited one or two days, but the thought of doing it in Korean excited me - it seemed to have something romantic about it.

After I sent the messages, I checked several times and they still hadn't been read, so I fell asleep. I woke up at around midnight to find that she had replied. There was a 'tongue' smiley face, so I figured she was being playful and it was good news. I did a quick translation with the apps and website and it seemed to suggest she was saying "no I didn't have lunch, I had it later".

I needed to be sure. If she thought I was asking about last Friday, then I needed to clarify. If this was a rejection, then I needed to know as well. So I copied and pasted the messages and sent it off to One for translation.

I woke up today and found nothing. I got to work and still nothing. But shortly after settling into my work day, One replied, saying "she said she's busy let's have it next time".

So it was a rejection then.

She had rejected me.

This was the end.

For the next 10 minutes, I sat there trying to read the brief in front of me, but my mind was a blur. I couldn't focus on anything. I didn't know what to do.

So I guess this is it, time to move on. The thought of seeing Bibi returned.

World War Z

Friday
At work, I had the internet 'on' on my phone, waiting for Luna's message to arrive. Either she'd say she could do lunch, or she couldn't. Or she could not say anything.

I waited until 1pm, when I was sure something was going to come. Nope, nothing. I left the office anyway, walking down to her part of town, just in case she messaged me which would enable me to meet quickly.

Still nothing.

I walked around the city feeling disappointed, and at one stage even had one tear leave my eye.

Was I supposed to follow up? 

Or was this her plan all along to show she wasn't interested?

Anyway, I tried to take my mind off that by thinking ahead for the dinner I was going to have with Bush. I knew if Luna messaged me to meet after work, I'd have to cancel on Bush, which, as bad as it is, I still had to do it. I figured I'd come up with some excuse about having to be home.

But even by 5pm, I still got no messages from Luna. So Bush dinner it was.

I went home, got the car and drove back out. We had arranged to meet at 7pm, but I got there at about 7:15pm and there was still no call from her hurrying me up. I pictured her and her friend Liz chatting away in the office, but when I called, turns out they were already at the restaurant and had been there for an hour.

I made my way quickly to the restaurant where I found them sitting at a table near the entrance. Bush introduced me to her colleague Liz. I told her she looked a bit familiar and that I may have seen her at court before. They had finished a bottle of wine and were a little giggly.

We ordered two pizzas to share and they were pretty good. We talked about work, and they bitched about their jobs. I found it kinda interesting to watch them act all giggly because of the wine, and contrasted it to people who get violent or aggressive when drunk (see: Nunjo).

After dinner I drove Bush home and we had a bit of a heart to heart talk about our futures. I told her since my contract was only for a year, that if they didn't renew it then I'd have to go to the bar. I also said that my family would be paying off our mortgage this year. She said she kinda regrets getting married at such a young age (26) and having kids, because it has set her back in her career. I said for now, yes, but in a few years time she'll look back and know she did the right thing.

I also showed her the messages with Luna, and she encouraged me to try again. She told me to stop being so negative. I silently agreed - I was being negative, looking for a 'no' where there wasn't.

When I dropped her off, she said "I'll call you tomorrow". I knew it was said only to be polite and that she wouldn't actually call me the next day, but I wondered why she said it.

I did consider going whoring afterwards. I thought about seeing Bibi. But then I thought about how much I liked Luna and decided against it. Can you believe that? I didn't go punting! Because of Luna! That is how much I like her!!!

Saturday
I woke up at 6:30am to go jogging with Malay. He brought along two loaves of bread to feed the ducks lol. It must've looked pretty weird I reckon, two Asian guys in sporting gear feeding ducks at 6:30am haha. But I liked it, and pictured me doing it with Luna.

We did one lap, which was enough for my knee. I realised afterwards we spent the whole time talking about me (work, Shuing, Brain, Luna and video games) and not him. I should be more interested in his life.

After that I went to the gym in the Wick then met a lady to buy a bag off her from ebay. I pictured some young slim attractive girl, given the female name with "88" after it (born in 1988?) but it was an older lady. We had a bit of a chat about ebay and the bag, then parted.

I walked home, then caught a bus out to the city to meet Jae and Ki Hoon for basketball. To be honest, even with his facebook picture, I still couldn't remember what he looked like. As I approached the meeting place (outside the college where I went to for Luna's meet up) I saw an Asian guy and nearly said hello to him thinking it was Jae.

I waited a few minutes before Jae showed up, and slowly began to recognise him. I couldn't remember my interaction with him that night. He called Ki Hoon and said he'd be here soon, and when I saw him, I recognised him instantly but also couldn't remember our interactions that night.

I asked Jae a bit about his English course. He said he was going to start intermediate in the coming week and Luna would be the teacher for that too.

Can we keep talking about Luna? Can we?

We all walked to the courts talking about basketball and Korea, and I felt like such a midget walking in between them. I didn't realise how tall they were that night.

Once at the courts, we sat around for a while waiting for a game to become available. There was one half court being utilised by a bunch of guys and girls who were there for a barbeque. I didn't think they would take long as I was sure they would tire themselves out soon, but they lasted a long time, and we ended up going to a court with the 'big boys' - including that Max guy I used to see around all the time.

The way the teams were split, I played first and they missed out. I was on Max's team and felt the pressure to play good, even though he was so friendly about everything like misses and turnovers. Can you picture that? A big black guy being so nice on a basketball court.

For the next game, I subbed off for Jae and watched him play. I could tell he was a basketball player, but maybe a little rusty. After that Ki Hoon took his place. He could sorta play, but wasn't as good as Jae.

We played a few more games before sitting down and watching a bit, then they said they wanted to go so we walked back to city before parting ways at World Square.

I used my new basketball too, the one Yang gave me for my birthday. And the first bounce of it went to...Jae. I am usually a bit particular about these things, but oh well.

Today
Had a game at 10am today, haven't had such an early game for a long time. We played B & Y, and were missing One and Bert. Alex Z was recovering from an ankle injury, so he wasn't at full capacity. Despite that, he still played his usual stellar game, but in this game everyone else chipped in with their own scoring.

I started the game with an intercept but missed the point blank fast break lay up. I don't know how I did that, I was so confident going to the rim too.

Close to half time I drove hard to the basket and drew a foul, sending me to the line where I hit one free throw. Then in the second half I hit a base line jump shot and an easy basket on a fast break, so finished with five points. The game was pretty close throughout until the last 10 minutes when we pulled away with an eight point lead.

Alex yelled at me at one stage, when I went out to block a three, and the guy drove past me where he drew a foul on Alex. He screamed at me to not let them drive, and I felt myself getting a bit embarrassed. As the free throws were being shot, I grabbed my knees and slumped my shoulders. I kept telling myself to shake it off, and finally managed to do it by re-focusing on the guy who had driven past me. I was determined to make his life hell, but then he subbed off soon after that.

After the game, Isaac, Jim, Mike, MJ and I sat around talking a bit. Then Alex left, and MJ left. Jim wanted to go outside instead of watching the game, so we watched the first half and then left. We saw Jim outside talking to MJ, then Mike, Mark, Jim and I went to Flemington to eat. We bitched about Bo and Alex Y mainly.

After that we went to the Auburn cinema to watch World War Z. It was a good movie, I liked it. Mark and I was sharing a popcorn, and he had it resting on the arm rest in between us. At one stage he spilled it onto me and I just cracked out laughing. It was actually easier to eat the popcorn from my hoodie than from the container. Then later as I was reaching for my drink I accidentally spilled it on him, and he said "now we're even" lol. But after that he spilled it onto me again lol.

Did she just fob me off?

I walked to work today, and figured I'd send Luna a message about tomorrow, just to 'touch base'. So when I got into the office, I sent her "my office is at [address], see you tomorrow! :)"

As usual, I went out at around 12ish to get lunch / go for a walk. I scoped out some new territory for lunch ideas and bumped into Hayley. We had a brief chat. I mentioned my contract was only for 12 months, she asked me what I was going to do and then added "going to the bar? I'll brief you". If only. It sounded good, but I am fairly sure she is the type who doesn't mean what they say.

I went to a men's wear shop to check out their sale, then to the post office to buy a box to send Abi his trophy (I know, it's been shamefully long), then to the supermarket to get a bottle of water as I was fed up with paying $2.50 for a bottle of freakin' water. I ended up buying a box of pasta from the shop below my office, and when I settled back down at my desk, saw Luna had just sent some messages!

Her @ 12:56 - If u didnt have lunch yet I wonder whether we can have today?

Her @ 12:58 - Since I suddenly have class tmr morning and Im not sure how long it's going to take

Me @ 12:59 - oh sorry Luna I am eating now :(

Me @ 13:00 - maybe you can let me know tomorrow how you are going?

Me @ 13:01 - or after work if that is better?

Her @ 13:44 - We will see tmr

My initial reaction was that it was a genuine re-schedule. But after some more thinking, I was beginning to wonder if she was fobbing me off. I mean, sending me the messages at 1pm via Kakaotalk, which I may not even see? Why not SMS? Maybe she was hoping she'd send it through, I'd read it long after 1pm, and it would be too late to accept her offer, so at least she 'tried'.

Another thing is, do I try to re-schedule if tomorrow she says she is busy, or do I accept it as fate and move on? Damn, she was the one who made me feel I didn't need to go whoring anymore. Guess not...

Birthday lunch with Mary, Sarah, Moira and Ogre

Woke up a bit late today but wanted to walk to work anyway, so only had a banana for breakfast.

Yesterday I had to cancel my appointment with Margie, because I knew I'd have lunch today with Mary and co, and lunch with Luna on Friday, so didn't want too many long lunches in one week. I mean, after all, I still haven't passed probation :p

Anyway, I went to DJ's at lunch to get some chocolate strawberries for them then headed down to World Square. I realised just now that I didn't even think about Erica as I was walking there. Instead, I wondered if I'd bump into Luna.

I got to the burger place on time, saw Bec and her husband, yet still had to wait almost 10 minutes for them to arrive, grrr.

I later found Mary, Moira and Sarah coming out of the restaurant, Mary and Sarah gave me hugs for my birthday and we sat down to wait for Ogre. They asked me about my work. I gave the usual spiel about how I had to mentally adjust as I was used to having a brief which showed everything that happened, yet now things were happening, or may not even happen. I caught Sarah giving Mary a look and wondered what it was that I said.

Mary half jokingly asked me to get her out of the job, and I was like "I gotta look out for myself first, I'm still on probation". I realised instantly how selfish that sounded and regretted that for a long time after lunch.

Ogre later arrived and we all went to order except Mary who was holding the table. She gave me $50 to cover her lunch and mine, but I ended up paying for us both, then when I tried to give it back she forced me to keep the money so ended up being her shout. I only got a small burger anyway as I wasn't feeling too well.

So they told me some news about the office, like Jim retiring, and also how Robert was getting into everyone's matters at the lowest levels and would come into your room to cross examine you to get the answer he wanted. Yes, I got a taste of that. So I think it's clear now that the honeymoon period is over.

They talked about Sarah's matter, and also BH's matter with Powell, and also Ogre's time at her work.

The semi-good thing about these lunches is that even though the original purpose was for me, it always tends to turn into a session about them. Fine with me really, as I just sit there and listen.

Ogre left first, and I thought I should use that opportunity to leave as well since it was now more than an hour since I'd left the office. But my social ineptitude got the better of me which left me sitting there. I waited for the next break in conversation before saying I had to go, and turned out that they all left as well. They all gave me hugs and Sarah nearly forgot her chocolate strawberry, hmmm.

I hurried back to the office, only to see Mob wasn't in her room. She wasn't in her room when I left, so wonder if I got away with it.

Buying the chocolate strawberries earlier gave me an idea - what if I bought one for Luna on Friday when we meet for lunch?? Or too soon?

Oh yeah, I never told you eh? This was how the messages went on Sunday:

Me @ 17:20 - Hi Luna, I didn't get much of a chance to speak to you last time. I was wondering if you'd be free for lunch this week in the city? :)

Her @ 17:54 - When is ur lunch time?

Me @ 18:53 - I get 1 hour between 12-2, is that suitable?

Her @ 18:55 - Then see u on Friday. Where do u work?

Me @ 19:39 - next to David Jones...I will meet you there at 1 on Friday?

Then nothing. Hmmm. Part of me, the insecure me, thinks she may cancel before that date. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

I wonder why she suggested Friday? Was it because of the rain, she wanted to maximise the chance that the rain would end by then? Or maybe it was because that was her day off, and she wanted to put time aside for me?

Also, why no reply? Did she mean specifically my work address? And when I didn't 'get it', she rolled her eyes and couldn't be bothered?

Do these messages represent a good sign? Does she really want to come, or is she just being polite/doesn't know how to say no?

The back of my mind couldn't help but fantasise today - I pictured meeting her, then shortly after leaning into her and saying, do I smell soju? Hahahahahhahahaha.