Another door closed...

Had no appetite again this morning. In fact, I found myself rolling around in bed way before the alarm went off.

I ended up driving to Macca's to get some breakfast. I didn't feel like toast or oats. I didn't even feel like Macca's, but thought it was the least likely food I'd throw back up.

I got into the office just before 8am, did some last minute prep and then went off to court. My matter really wasn't going to start till after 11:30am, but I got there at 10am anyway just because I like to know what's happening. Lucky I did too, cause the matter was mentioned and I had to let the court know what was happening.

After around 11:30 the other sol shows up, tells me this completely weird thing that he's going to rely on, and then tries to talk to me to keep me from looking it up. After a while I excused myself to make a call, but really went to look things up. I looked it up and knew he was wrong, but called Alanna to confirm anyway. I didn't have her direct number so found myself calling someone else and being re-directed to her. I felt like James Bond in that scene where he asks to be put through to M, hehe.

When our matter started, he ended up being wrong, which was good. We both spent quite a bit of time making subs and answering questions from the bench. The judge wanted to decide over lunch, so during lunch I went to eat Macca's and also decided to do a bit of shopping. I bought a pack of lychee pudding things to share with the people back at the office. Ok, so the truth is, I had Katie in mind. I just wanted to 'make peace' again, and stop this hostile environment.

But also, you know what I realised? People break up. I saw that Asa on fb had broken up. And he looks like a pretty nice guy. His girl was very pretty. They looked like a good match, and they broke up. Lara Bingle and Michael Clarke broke up. Fuck, anything can happen. And, like Shuing says, I'll be there when the ball drops.

When we went back to court, found out that I had lost. Faaark. I wonder if my boss will think anything of this.

I caught the train back and by then it was like 4pm. I handed around the puddings to most people. I was hoping Yoshi would be in Katie's room because I knew Katie would have her defences up if she was by herself. And also I wanted to give the impression that I wasn't trying to hit on her anymore.

Luckily, she was in Katie's room. I knocked on the door and offered them the pudding. I felt a warmer response from Yoshi than from Katie, but neither reached out, so I just took them out and gave it to them. I left straight away. I was hoping Katie would ask me about court, but she didn't. I guess that's a sign.

I went and had a long talk to Alanna about court and also about other matters that she had marked. I didn't really get any work done, and they were upgrading the computers so we all had to shut down by 5pm.

I met with Ele at 6pm outside her work. I bought her a chocolate easter bunny. My plan was to secretly wait outside, then message her saying I wasn't going to make it, see her reaction, and then surprise her. But to my disappointment, after she came out she went back inside. When I walked across I saw her talking on the phone in the lobby.

She saw me and came out. Apparently she was talking to Michael L, and invited him to dinner. Grrrr. I guess that was a sign too. I kept secretly hoping that he wouldn't come, but he did.

On our way there, Ele also said she had invited a girl who was a big fan of mine.

Great.

We met up with Michael L, and then the girl showed up. Her name was Jessica. She looked really young. And small.

We went downstairs near where I work to that Shanghainese place for dinner. We waited for a while for a table.

During dinner Ele said she was getting married. I thought she was joking. I looked at Michael L and he nodded, saying she was serious.

Fuck...shit...

I stayed silent for a long time after that. So silent that everyone realised and asked why I was being quiet. Apparently her boyfriend had quit his job and was coming back here.

I got the feeling that Ele had tried to set me up with Jessica. But I wasn't attracted to her. What made it worse was that she got my business card and mobile number.

When we finished dinner, Jessica said she needed to do a bit of shopping. Michael L left, but Ele and I waited outside the supermarket. I asked her if she was trying to set me up, and she said she wasn't, and laughed, but I knew she was. I told her I wasn't interested and didn't want to give anyone false hope.

I also told her briefly about Katie. She said a guy at her work asked her out to lunch almost everyday, and although she got the hint, she never mentioned her boyfriend, because she was afraid of being wrong about her suspicions. She said, however, that she just flat out rejected his invitations. So I thought, at least Katie re-scheduled?

Then Jesssica finished her shopping and re-joined us, which put a halt to our conversation.

I had to catch the bus back with Jessica because she lives near the uni near me. Bloody hell. I kept making small talk, and wondered whether Katie had done the same to me.

It couldn't be...we had laughs, she kept my lolly, and she had that special type of nervousness about her...

If Jessica gave me a lolly, I sure as hell wouldn't keep it in my draw at work. I wouldn't keep it at all. I'd either eat it or chuck it.