Down in the dumpster
Friday night I had my long anticipated rendezvous with Angel. I called after I got home and the guy was like "maybe, she usually works Friday nights from 8". I called back at 9pm and booked. So I headed out with my chocolate strawberries. I had thought about not having sex and just talking, but then doing that and giving the chocolate strawberries would seem a bit weird and desperate.
It was either talk and no strawberries, or sex and strawberries. Or maybe sex and no strawberries. In the end I decided on sex and strawberries.
I went in and told the guy I had a booking. Moments later Angel came to get me. I recognised her, whereas before if you had asked me to remember what she looked like, I would've seriously struggled. She did look a bit older.
She led me to the room down near the back door on the ground floor. She saw me holding the container and asked me what it was. I said it was a secret. She kept asking and I said not to worry about it. She wouldn't let it go until I finally said I'd show her. I asked her if she trusted me and she said yes. I asked her to cover her eyes and she did. I put a strawberry to her mouth and she took a look at it before taking a bite.
She seemed to find it novel. I asked if she remembered my name but she had forgotten. She said she remembered we were in the room on the mid-floor and that we talked about Korea. I sat on the bed a bit, feeling tired, and she leaned against me as I held her head. She grabbed my chest and I grabbed hers. She half protested, saying it wasn't the same. I was like, how isn't it?
Soon we were fidgeting with each other and I was massaging her breasts, then when I moved to undo her shorts, she asked to shower. So we got undressed and I held her from behind and kissed her neck. She seems to like that.
We showered and then moved onto the bed. She did her usual stuff and like last time, I somehow couldn't bring myself to finish. Was I thinking too much? Was I thinking about Victoria?
We ended up talking, and I grabbed my phone. I asked for her Kakaotalk and she said maybe later. Hmm not a good sign. We got talking about money a bit, and I was playfully saying she didn't need it. I said we could live on the streets together, and she said she liked luxury. I asked her if she wanted to go hot pot one day and she seemed a little interested.
As we got dressed after the buzzer, I playfully suggested extending until she finished work. Obviously she agreed, but I asked her how much and she said it'd be about $1,000. I said I'd do it if she came to dinner with me after but she said no.
So I left, still feeling a little buzzed. I did consider grabbing $1000 and coming back, but then decided I'd try to see another girl first. I went to see one I found on Wechat a few days ago, called Jessie. I went to her apartment, and she was obviously working as a private. She looked Thai, but told me she was half Vietnamese and half Japanese.
I managed to finish this time, and left. Thankfully that did it for me and I went home.
Saturday
I didn't have any plans, and didn't go to basketball because I wanted to be cautious with my knee. It was still a little sore from the City2Surf. There was no point risking it for streetball. So at about noon, I headed out to the casino with $800.
My plan was to try to win as much as I could. I'd give myself as much time as possible. I felt like I could stay there forever...and drown all my sorrows away as well.
There were no 'good' tables around when I arrived. Most were empty, although one was somewhat busy with about three players. I watched on and decided to wait for someone to lose and leave. I had time. One Asian guy had lost a few spins and was getting frustrated. He cashed in his remaining chips and left.
I took his seat and bought in. The dealer was a young Caucasian girl. She was about to give me the same colour as the guy who just left until I said any colour but that. I was a little superstitious. Because there were other players around, I could afford to sit and wait till I thought it would hit in my sectors.
I was up a little bit then started slowly losing. There was a dealer change soon after, a young Asian guy. I had him as a dealer before, and saw him on another table earlier but didn't like the look of him. I guess I just didn't like his slicked back hair. He also looked a bit like a dick. He did, however, have the same name as me.
Within the his first two spins, he managed to clean everyone out - except me. They all left, but there was an older Asian man sitting at the end watching. Somehow, the three of us got into a long talk about gambling. I did play a few rounds during this but we spent most of his shift on this table talking. We talked about:
- he told us that the casino was losing money on the $5 tables and that's why they introduced the $10 tables and added a '00' for the $5 tables
- he said there is a $25 roulette table, and that only needs one customer a day to cover its costs for the day
- the older man said that there used to be a 'temporary casino' while this was being built, apparently they wanted to make the most of their licence as soon as it was issued
- the dealer said he knew all the strategies in roulette
- the dealer said he gambles as well, but only inter-state
- he said he gets paid $20 per hour (net)
- there is a lady who goes to the casino every day with like $10-20,000 and wins $200 and leaves
I got the feeling that the dealer was a little bitter about his job, and that he was money hungry. He definitely seemed like the type that could be coaxed into doing some sort of fraud against the casino. He even mentioned past frauds briefly, and added that when he takes his uniform off outside, the casino won't know the difference between him and me.
Interestingly, throughout all this I was trying to keep an eye on the supervisor - that young Korean girl I had seen before. She is so attractive in that plain Jane type of way. I wondered if the dealer would get into trouble for talking too much, but then again, at least he was keeping us at the table. I felt a bit bad about not playing that much, but I suppose I could've cashed in and just sat there talking like the older man.
After he left, there wasn't much more talk from me. His replacement dealer was a tall Vietnamese looking guy who knew the older man, but didn't seem to want to talk to me. I managed to survive through his shift, and then a large Caucasian bald man with a moustache took over. I survived him too. After that was an old Caucasian man, who I thought was gay. His name was Anthony.
A few times I was on my deathbed, but soon I was up about $140. I told myself to win $10 more and try to wait for the Caucasian girl to come back, just as a feat to go through all their shifts. However, I didn't stick to my word. Even when she started her shift on my table again, I didn't leave. I told myself I could win a bit more.
With all the previous dealers, I was lucky enough that they never went on a streak of hitting the same section more than four times. And so based on that, I ended up predicting with some luck when the different sector would hit. The trouble was, I assumed this girl would be the same. She actually ended up hitting the 1-2 sector like 8 times in a row which ultimately killed me.
I was mentally fucked. Keep in mind I had been there for like five hours. Only time I left was to go to the toilet during Anthony's shift. Even before I lost, I was feeling a bit dizzy. I hadn't had breakfast or lunch. Part of me wanted to faint. And now, added on top of that was a loss when I could've left with a win.
I left feeling like shit (what a surprise). It was raining, and I went to the McDonald's nearby. I had a meal and sat down next to a bunch of Koreans. I felt really, really depressed. And alone. I really hadn't taken the Victoria rejection well. Metaphorically, I was down in the dumpster.
Later that night, I tried calling the bank to reinstate my re-draw facility on my personal loan, but they kept me on hold for too long.
Today
Again, I had no plans. I woke up and then went back to sleep. I thought about taking out the last $400n from my credit card and slamming it down in one bet at the casino. I thought about going for a punt.
In the end, I did neither. I played video games at home, and then vacuumed the house. I then went out to do some grocery shopping. While at the supermarket, I remembered the idea to make a donut burger. So I bought the necessary ingredients and went home to make one and took photos of it.
I was glad I didn't do anything stupid. However, this morning I did manage to get through to the bank and get my re-draw facility reinstated. They told me (again) that if I deactivate it again, then it's permanent.
Maybe it's the gambling me talking, but I have a plan to use the money to try to pay off the loan. Yeah yeah, I've done it before and got fucked up. So what's different now? Well, nothing much, but this time I will:
- keep a written record of my winnings and losings
- focus on being disciplined
- take $2000 with me to the casino, and leave as soon as my gain is $100 or more
If I lose $2000, then that's the end of it.
Let's see how this turns out.
Also today, I changed my Kakaotalk picture to one of me and Jin. I then sent Victoria a game invite. She read it at about 9am. Wonder what she thinks. Am I a dickhead? Probably.
It was either talk and no strawberries, or sex and strawberries. Or maybe sex and no strawberries. In the end I decided on sex and strawberries.
I went in and told the guy I had a booking. Moments later Angel came to get me. I recognised her, whereas before if you had asked me to remember what she looked like, I would've seriously struggled. She did look a bit older.
She led me to the room down near the back door on the ground floor. She saw me holding the container and asked me what it was. I said it was a secret. She kept asking and I said not to worry about it. She wouldn't let it go until I finally said I'd show her. I asked her if she trusted me and she said yes. I asked her to cover her eyes and she did. I put a strawberry to her mouth and she took a look at it before taking a bite.
She seemed to find it novel. I asked if she remembered my name but she had forgotten. She said she remembered we were in the room on the mid-floor and that we talked about Korea. I sat on the bed a bit, feeling tired, and she leaned against me as I held her head. She grabbed my chest and I grabbed hers. She half protested, saying it wasn't the same. I was like, how isn't it?
Soon we were fidgeting with each other and I was massaging her breasts, then when I moved to undo her shorts, she asked to shower. So we got undressed and I held her from behind and kissed her neck. She seems to like that.
We showered and then moved onto the bed. She did her usual stuff and like last time, I somehow couldn't bring myself to finish. Was I thinking too much? Was I thinking about Victoria?
We ended up talking, and I grabbed my phone. I asked for her Kakaotalk and she said maybe later. Hmm not a good sign. We got talking about money a bit, and I was playfully saying she didn't need it. I said we could live on the streets together, and she said she liked luxury. I asked her if she wanted to go hot pot one day and she seemed a little interested.
As we got dressed after the buzzer, I playfully suggested extending until she finished work. Obviously she agreed, but I asked her how much and she said it'd be about $1,000. I said I'd do it if she came to dinner with me after but she said no.
So I left, still feeling a little buzzed. I did consider grabbing $1000 and coming back, but then decided I'd try to see another girl first. I went to see one I found on Wechat a few days ago, called Jessie. I went to her apartment, and she was obviously working as a private. She looked Thai, but told me she was half Vietnamese and half Japanese.
I managed to finish this time, and left. Thankfully that did it for me and I went home.
Saturday
I didn't have any plans, and didn't go to basketball because I wanted to be cautious with my knee. It was still a little sore from the City2Surf. There was no point risking it for streetball. So at about noon, I headed out to the casino with $800.
My plan was to try to win as much as I could. I'd give myself as much time as possible. I felt like I could stay there forever...and drown all my sorrows away as well.
There were no 'good' tables around when I arrived. Most were empty, although one was somewhat busy with about three players. I watched on and decided to wait for someone to lose and leave. I had time. One Asian guy had lost a few spins and was getting frustrated. He cashed in his remaining chips and left.
I took his seat and bought in. The dealer was a young Caucasian girl. She was about to give me the same colour as the guy who just left until I said any colour but that. I was a little superstitious. Because there were other players around, I could afford to sit and wait till I thought it would hit in my sectors.
I was up a little bit then started slowly losing. There was a dealer change soon after, a young Asian guy. I had him as a dealer before, and saw him on another table earlier but didn't like the look of him. I guess I just didn't like his slicked back hair. He also looked a bit like a dick. He did, however, have the same name as me.
Within the his first two spins, he managed to clean everyone out - except me. They all left, but there was an older Asian man sitting at the end watching. Somehow, the three of us got into a long talk about gambling. I did play a few rounds during this but we spent most of his shift on this table talking. We talked about:
- he told us that the casino was losing money on the $5 tables and that's why they introduced the $10 tables and added a '00' for the $5 tables
- he said there is a $25 roulette table, and that only needs one customer a day to cover its costs for the day
- the older man said that there used to be a 'temporary casino' while this was being built, apparently they wanted to make the most of their licence as soon as it was issued
- the dealer said he knew all the strategies in roulette
- the dealer said he gambles as well, but only inter-state
- he said he gets paid $20 per hour (net)
- there is a lady who goes to the casino every day with like $10-20,000 and wins $200 and leaves
I got the feeling that the dealer was a little bitter about his job, and that he was money hungry. He definitely seemed like the type that could be coaxed into doing some sort of fraud against the casino. He even mentioned past frauds briefly, and added that when he takes his uniform off outside, the casino won't know the difference between him and me.
Interestingly, throughout all this I was trying to keep an eye on the supervisor - that young Korean girl I had seen before. She is so attractive in that plain Jane type of way. I wondered if the dealer would get into trouble for talking too much, but then again, at least he was keeping us at the table. I felt a bit bad about not playing that much, but I suppose I could've cashed in and just sat there talking like the older man.
After he left, there wasn't much more talk from me. His replacement dealer was a tall Vietnamese looking guy who knew the older man, but didn't seem to want to talk to me. I managed to survive through his shift, and then a large Caucasian bald man with a moustache took over. I survived him too. After that was an old Caucasian man, who I thought was gay. His name was Anthony.
A few times I was on my deathbed, but soon I was up about $140. I told myself to win $10 more and try to wait for the Caucasian girl to come back, just as a feat to go through all their shifts. However, I didn't stick to my word. Even when she started her shift on my table again, I didn't leave. I told myself I could win a bit more.
With all the previous dealers, I was lucky enough that they never went on a streak of hitting the same section more than four times. And so based on that, I ended up predicting with some luck when the different sector would hit. The trouble was, I assumed this girl would be the same. She actually ended up hitting the 1-2 sector like 8 times in a row which ultimately killed me.
I was mentally fucked. Keep in mind I had been there for like five hours. Only time I left was to go to the toilet during Anthony's shift. Even before I lost, I was feeling a bit dizzy. I hadn't had breakfast or lunch. Part of me wanted to faint. And now, added on top of that was a loss when I could've left with a win.
I left feeling like shit (what a surprise). It was raining, and I went to the McDonald's nearby. I had a meal and sat down next to a bunch of Koreans. I felt really, really depressed. And alone. I really hadn't taken the Victoria rejection well. Metaphorically, I was down in the dumpster.
Later that night, I tried calling the bank to reinstate my re-draw facility on my personal loan, but they kept me on hold for too long.
Today
Again, I had no plans. I woke up and then went back to sleep. I thought about taking out the last $400n from my credit card and slamming it down in one bet at the casino. I thought about going for a punt.
In the end, I did neither. I played video games at home, and then vacuumed the house. I then went out to do some grocery shopping. While at the supermarket, I remembered the idea to make a donut burger. So I bought the necessary ingredients and went home to make one and took photos of it.
I was glad I didn't do anything stupid. However, this morning I did manage to get through to the bank and get my re-draw facility reinstated. They told me (again) that if I deactivate it again, then it's permanent.
Maybe it's the gambling me talking, but I have a plan to use the money to try to pay off the loan. Yeah yeah, I've done it before and got fucked up. So what's different now? Well, nothing much, but this time I will:
- keep a written record of my winnings and losings
- focus on being disciplined
- take $2000 with me to the casino, and leave as soon as my gain is $100 or more
If I lose $2000, then that's the end of it.
Let's see how this turns out.
Also today, I changed my Kakaotalk picture to one of me and Jin. I then sent Victoria a game invite. She read it at about 9am. Wonder what she thinks. Am I a dickhead? Probably.
posted by toey | 21:50
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