End Erica?
I think I finally lost it yesterday.
I messaged her saying she could call me anytime she couldn't sleep, and she replied at about 2am saying she had a rough day. When I woke up at about 6:30am, I replied saying next time when we go out "I will pamper you". Probably not the best choice of words, but I couldn't think of anything else.
She read the message at about 8am and no reply. It bugged me all day at work, until finally at 4pm I messaged her asking if she was ok, and asking her to call me when she had time as I missed talking to her. At 4:34pm she replied saying she didn't understand. I replied immediately (big mistake, shows desperation) saying my work was not busy and I asked if I could call her. She said she was busy and would call me after work.
So I left the internet on my phone switched on last night as I slept. I woke up in the middle of the night only to see...nothing. I'm not sure if it was possible, but I felt like as I slept, I was subconsciously waiting for the phone to ring. I woke up today disappointed to see no missed calls or messages.
She'll call you at about 7:30-8am.
So I held my phone as I walked to work and kept checking it at every available opportunity.
Nothing.
I got to the office and there was still nothing. I told myself to wait until 3pm-ish, as she'd be up by then. I figured she was probably too tired to call after work, but would call me when she woke up. But as the day went on, it wasn't looking good. I started mentally prying myself away from her. I started telling myself that if there was no call by the end of the day, then I'd go find someone else to at least distract myself and have a second option.
I also wondered if this meant it was the end?
And sure enough, there was nothing at the end of the day. At 6pm I left the office and went to that massage place in the city. I was shown about six girls, and I went with the first one, called Sophie. She looked better in the line up than up close. The massage was ok, but I could not see myself dating her. Maybe I was still absorbed with Erica, or maybe I just wasn't attracted to Sophie. I don't know.
During the massage I kept thinking about blowing more money by going to Naby's shop after, but after it was finished, those thoughts dissipated. I then went to Macca's and ate something, feeling a little down. Guess this is what I have to do when gambling is not an option (although I seem to have attached myself to the lesser evil of lotto tickets).
So I wonder, is this the end? Does she not want to see me ever again? Had I come off as too desperate and clingy?
I messaged her saying she could call me anytime she couldn't sleep, and she replied at about 2am saying she had a rough day. When I woke up at about 6:30am, I replied saying next time when we go out "I will pamper you". Probably not the best choice of words, but I couldn't think of anything else.
She read the message at about 8am and no reply. It bugged me all day at work, until finally at 4pm I messaged her asking if she was ok, and asking her to call me when she had time as I missed talking to her. At 4:34pm she replied saying she didn't understand. I replied immediately (big mistake, shows desperation) saying my work was not busy and I asked if I could call her. She said she was busy and would call me after work.
So I left the internet on my phone switched on last night as I slept. I woke up in the middle of the night only to see...nothing. I'm not sure if it was possible, but I felt like as I slept, I was subconsciously waiting for the phone to ring. I woke up today disappointed to see no missed calls or messages.
She'll call you at about 7:30-8am.
So I held my phone as I walked to work and kept checking it at every available opportunity.
Nothing.
I got to the office and there was still nothing. I told myself to wait until 3pm-ish, as she'd be up by then. I figured she was probably too tired to call after work, but would call me when she woke up. But as the day went on, it wasn't looking good. I started mentally prying myself away from her. I started telling myself that if there was no call by the end of the day, then I'd go find someone else to at least distract myself and have a second option.
I also wondered if this meant it was the end?
And sure enough, there was nothing at the end of the day. At 6pm I left the office and went to that massage place in the city. I was shown about six girls, and I went with the first one, called Sophie. She looked better in the line up than up close. The massage was ok, but I could not see myself dating her. Maybe I was still absorbed with Erica, or maybe I just wasn't attracted to Sophie. I don't know.
During the massage I kept thinking about blowing more money by going to Naby's shop after, but after it was finished, those thoughts dissipated. I then went to Macca's and ate something, feeling a little down. Guess this is what I have to do when gambling is not an option (although I seem to have attached myself to the lesser evil of lotto tickets).
So I wonder, is this the end? Does she not want to see me ever again? Had I come off as too desperate and clingy?
posted by toey | 20:34
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