The big grocery shop

On Friday night I had messaged Erica saying I'd like to have lunch with her the next day. It wasn't read until the next day, so obviously I was worried, given her previous status update about standing at a veranda and looking out.

She later read it at around noon and didn't reply. I asked if we could meet today. She didn't reply to that either. I asked her to tell me what was happening as I was worried. She said she wasn't happy as she needed to be in a cast for six more weeks, and also that rent money was due soon.

Great...the money thing again.

I asked how much and she said $1200 for two weeks. I asked her to come out to talk and she said no. I asked if she wanted to see me and she said no, not today. I asked her out to lunch for tomorrow and she didn't reply. These were my feeble attempts at seeing if she'd come out with me even if no money was involved.

Then I thought about it.

Fuck, what if she dumps me over this? Or she finds another guy willing to pay her rent money? Then I've effectively wasted $25000 because I wasn't willing to pay another $3600 for six weeks?

Yes, I was in panic mode now. Insecurity mode. Desperation mode.

I said I'd help with the rent money. She didn't reply for a while. She then said Australia was too hard for her, something about cost of living, that she had no family here, her body was no good and she had no friends. She said she felt alone. I tried to comfort her but don't think it helped. She said "words do not help". She then said something about me always using many words, and I joked "bad lawyer :)" which seemed to lighten the mood.

At about 5:30pm I was playing GTA V when she called, saying she needed to go grocery shopping and asking if I could help. I said ok, and she said there'd be many things to buy and asked if that was ok. I said yes. I guess I was just desperate again. The other thing is, Jim and I had discovered this Korean supermarket on Thursday before our game and after our gym session, and I really wanted to take Erica there, so I suggested we go to North Strathfield and she said ok.

So at about 6pm I drove out there to pick her up. There was a Korean guy parked outside in a Camry and I figured he was some Korean courier. When she came out I was surprised to see she wasn't on crutches. Now her cast had been changed to a big metal boot. She approached the Camry and said a few words, so looks like I was right. She was wearing this extremely long white t-shirt which had 'BIKE' on the front.

She came into my car and I started driving off. It was a bit quiet at first, and then it got a bit heated as she talked about her mom, that I asked her to come out to talk when she wasn't happy. I said I was worried she'd kill herself and she did say she thought about it. Things started getting better as we drove along. She didn't seem to like my Girls Generation CD, saying the songs were old (admittedly from 2005) and then started playing some male singer Korean ballard song from her phone.

She said she went to the doctor on Thursday instead of Wednesday. She was asked if she wanted surgery, and because she didn't, she had to use the 'Robocop' metal shoe.

She said when she told her friend she was going to Strathfield, her friend suggested a really nice Japanese restaurant and so she wanted us to go there for dinner afterwards.

Great, now I have to pay for grocery AND dinner.

When we stepped inside the store, her eyes lit up and I could tell she liked it. She even said she liked it. It made me happy to have chosen something she liked. I did think about the risk that she wouldn't like it, and figured we could go to one elsewhere.

So we pushed the trolley through the isles and she had a shopping list. I was a bit worried about how much all this would cost, and only had about $500 in the bank. Surely she couldn't buy more than $500 worth of groceries, right?

She got a lot of stuff, and I got like three things for myself. In the middle of it she suggested we go for our picnic the next day so she was buying stuff for that too. I must admit, it was kinda fun doing this, albeit expensive. I guess I like feeling like a couple.

When we went to the register, it felt like some sort of game show where I had to get as much of the stuff from the trolley onto the sliding thing as fast as I could with the cashier processing it as fast as possible. There was so much stuff. It all came to a total of $330 so I was ok.

She also bought some alcohol as well. This is when one of those 'moments' happened for me. The receptionist gave me the receipt, and as I already had a few things in my hand, I offered to put the receipt in the plastic bag Erica was holding. She said no, that she didn't like it. I put it in anyway and she gave me a death stare. I took it back out thinking "why do I put up with this shit".

Anyway, I dismissed it as something trivial (but I'm sure it'll come up in the list of reasons for leaving if I ever come to that) and we left, putting all the stuff into my car.

She called Suri and had me speak to her for a bit. Apparently Suri had been to this supermarket before and wanted to come next time.

We went for dinner and there was a bit of drama about that too. I couldn't find parking near the restaurant so suggested she get off there and wait because of her foot (I didn't want her walking too much) and she didn't want that. She didn't want to go into the restaurant first and wait while I parked at the shopping centre, so we ended up going to the shopping centre together.

We found the restaurant her friend suggested. Apparently she wanted some sort of fish which cost $150 per kilogram, and even she thought that was too expensive so we left. I'm not sure if she wanted to leave because it was too expensive for her, or too expensive for my unemployed situation.

We went to one that was next door to the one we went to last time. We ordered a hot pot which was a little spicy so it was nice. She was messaging Suri back and forth, and I started to check fb on my phone and she kept interfering with it. It was her way of telling me not to play on my phone during dinner. I thought about the "but you're doing the same thing" argument but knew that would just start a fight. She later said Suri was messaging her but she asked her to stop as she was having dinner.

She also said Suri wanted to come to Strathfield for dinner on Wednesday. I asked what time and she said what does it matter as I now have free time.

She doesn't trust me completely.

I explained that I was trading shares between 10am to 4pm from home and hoped she didn't pick 4pm to test me. She said 6pm so phew.

I saw another couple sitting at a few tables away from us and saw the guy comforting his girlfriend by stroking her face as she seemed to panic about something. I wondered if it was always women who create drama in a relationship.

Later on, this tall dark guy came into the restaurant and sat at the table next to us. He caught my attention because he was tall, and because he was by himself. During his meal he said something in Korean which caught Erica's attention because she was surprised he could speak Korean. He told us he had lived in Korea for two years and then started talking to us.

Although Erica made the initial 'contact', it seemed that she left me to do the talking from there. We wandered in and out of our conversation as I wasn't too interested in talking to him and wondered what motives he had. Maybe I was just being insecure, but I thought he may have been trying to pick up Erica. Sometimes I wish she wasn't so friendly.

I sized the guy up and figured he'd be a lot stronger than me - he was not only tall, but quite built. But I figured I'd have to have a go anyway.

He said some things which seemed a bit weird to me, like he would drive to the city and eat ice cream by himself. Either this guy was a total loner or was hiding something. I had no doubt he was into brothels and probably Korean girls. He just had a bit of a strange vibe about him.

Anyway, Erica was gesturing for me to go, and I thought "great, thanks for starting the conversation then". So I went to pay and then came back and the guy chatted with us a bit more before we left. Erica was a bit drunk by now and was holding her and she kept jumping up and down lol. I told her the guy was a bit weird and she said when I left to pay, he asked her if I was her boyfriend. Then out of the corner of my eye I spotted the guy walking behind us. I wanted to stop with Erica so he could walk past us instead of 'following us'.

So I held her as she smoked, and continued jumping up and down, completely oblivious to what my concerns were even though I tried to tell her. I saw the guy cross the road and get into his car after standing around for a bit. Erica kept rubbing herself against me and was now creating a bit of a scene. She wanted me to carry her and I said no and we walked back to my car. We saw a lingerie store on the way and she told me she had three sets of lingerie and wanted six. She told me her bust size was 32A.

On the drive back she spoke to her Uncle's daughter or Uncle's sister and had me speak on the phone to her for a bit. Then she spoke/texted someone else and asked me "do you know 127?" and I knew by that she meant her shop. I said yes and she asked if we could go there to pick up her friend Jin Ju.

I joked that she could wait in the car and I'd go in and she got a bit angry at that but also found it funny lol. When we got there, it did bring back some unexpected memories of all the times I'd walk through the alleyway to get to the shop. She said she needed to go to the toilet and went into the shop. I wondered what that would look like, with a girl who works there, on 'sick leave' walking in with a metal shoe lol.

I waited a while before they came out. I gave her friend one of the cakes I had in my car and was surprised she took it. Erica told me her friend's name and I was like "I know" but I think it was her way of trying to get me to make conversation. Whenever there was a bit of silence Erica would say something, which I liked.

I dropped them off and helped take the groceries to the lifts and then went home.