Thursday comp: 2-9-2

On Wednesday night, after gym I checked my phone and saw a missed call from Ele about 30 minutes beforehand. I called back but she didn't pick up. I wonder what it was about.

On Thursday we lost another juror. There was a note from one of them saying they would probably need time off in September for work, and most people agreed that we didn't want someone there who had a distraction in the back of their mind instead of focusing on the case, so we all asked for the juror to be discharged. Only variations were that DD asked to give the juror a choice, and CW asked to see which juror it was (no way in hell that was going to happen).

I thought it was the bank guy, so I messaged Ele and Michael L asking if they knew of that bank having a conference in September. Michael L replied saying he didn't know, adding that he didn't work for that bank.

Well I know you don't WORK for that bank you fucking idiot, but I was just asking because YOU'RE in the banking INDUSTRY!

God, why do people do that. It's like they have to state the obvious to step on you. I wonder if it shows his insecurity.

Ele replied a bit later, saying something about video conferences to cut down costs. Guess I didn't make myself clear.

It ended up being the big blonde lady in the middle front, which was a shame, because I started liking her. At first I thought she was really against us, but as the case unfolded, she seemed to come around and understand where our clients were coming from.

It was sad to see her go, I think everyone felt that way. It reminded me of a game show where someone gets voted off. It's just group dynamics I guess.

Also felt sorry for DY who continued her closing. I mean, who the hell is going to concentrate after losing someone from the group they've been together with for the past 10 months?

I had packed my own lunch and ate it in the office. It felt nice to have a change, since lately it seems that I have been going out for lunch a lot.

We had an early finish because one of the jurors said they were sick, so I caught the train home to get ready for bball. Sunz was supposed to come. I told him the time last week, but I actually had to call him to find out that he probably wasn't going to make it.

I seriously wonder whether it's me, or is it actually rude to tell someone you'll be there and then not even tell them when you change your mind?

Anyway, I decided to stop by the casino, lost $100 and then left. Probably because of that, I was a bit late for duty, but luckily Mike had his friend come along and they were there before I was.

I got changed in the car. I was planning to play, lightly, if we didn't have enough. While I was doing duty, Abi sent me a message saying he couldn't make it. That was it. I had no choice. I had to play to avoid the forfeit fee.

In the perfect world, my comeback wouldn't have been like this. I wouldn't be playing on this night. In a perfect world, I would've had surgery, spent the next six months doing rehab and practising, then coming back better than before, and with a vengeance. I wasn't supposed to come back like this, damaged and unprepared.

Donning my No.91 yellow jersey for the first time, and wearing a knee brace on my right leg and my trade mark long black sock on my left, I stepped onto the court. I heard the referee say something about taking a necklace off, and then moments later repeated it in my ear. I hadn't even remembered I was wearing a necklace! That's how out of touch I was. I also didn't even remember to bring a drink, but figured it didn't matter since I wasn't going to do much running.

But as soon as I stepped onto the court, everything became automatic. I shook hands with the other team and resumed my position at the jump ball. It was like I had never left at all.

I was cautious at first but soon realised I could run fairly freely, and so I did. I think the guys on my team kept a watchful eye on me, and Mike even told me to take it easy. But I felt good, and wanted to make the most of it. As the game went on, I started feeling better and more confident. The only thing I couldn't do was shoot a jump shot three. When I caught the ball at the three point line, I had the biggest urge to just jump straight up and launch, but I hadn't done that since May, and so didn't have the confidence to see how that would affect my knee. Instead, I launched set shots from beyond the three, which I wasn't even used to.

My first real moment came when I got an offensive rebound, took a dribble back out, then turned around, jumped and launched it. It looked good, but was just a bit short. I had actually jumped over a taller defender to get that shot off.

Hehehe, I can still jump you mother fuckers.

Of course, we got smashed, but it didn't matter - for me anyway. This wasn't about winning, this was about me stepping in. In the second half, I found myself running more freely, driving in and dishing. I made some really snappy passes to both Roger and Fab, which sometimes led to baskets, and I realised how much different our game looked with me playing the point instead of Geoff.

First of all, there were less turnovers. Before the game, I watched the two teams playing during duty, and wondered how on earth I was going to even protect the ball. Everyone was playing so fast, so tough, so rough. How was I, this cripple, going to withstand completely healthy and strong guys?

Luckily the team we played were a bit slow, and I managed to run past them fairly easily.

Secondly, I didn't just take the ball up and lose it or launch a jumpshot. I amde efforts to pass it and then set screens, and like I said, later in the game I would drive and dish, which made a huge difference. After the game Mike even said it felt like we played more as a team that night.

I was determined to score at least one basket. I wanted to show that, even like this, I could still be effective. I was fouled in the air when passing but received two shots. I was so excited to go to the line, and even more excited when I missed the first, but disappointed when I missed the second.

Finally, in the last minute, I drove against a defense which had already given up due to pity, and managed to lay in a little floater.

I did it. I scored two points with an almost-torn ACL.

I felt so proud as the game ended and I walked over to the bench. In my mind, I was comparing myself to Fat Pat - if there was a media, I'd want them to contrast how he ditched a team just because it was losing, against me, who was injured and still stepped in to avoid a forfeit. Two very different spirits.

We sat around for a bit afterwards (except Fab), and I talked to Roger. We seem to really get along. Turns out he's 25 and seems to like basketball quite a bit, even though he doesn't play any other time and doesn't do any other type of exercise.

I gave him a lift to his car outside, dropped Mike's friend home near the train station and then drove Mike home. I had wanted to bring this up during duty but of course it didn't pan out the way I wanted. So I finally said to him, "keep this between us, but in a way, I blame Fat Pat for what happened to my knee", and explained why and asked what he thought.

I knew I was stretching my reasoning a bit, but that was really how I felt and I wanted to know what he thought. To me, I will always look back at that last game on 10 May and see it as how Fat Pat quit on the team, which forced me to play harder which caused my knee injury. He left a team to die. That's how I see it.

Mike made two points: 1) that I could've gotten injured even if Fat Pat played; and 2) it was a forced jump shot over two defenders that lead to my injury.

I agree with the first point, but 1) things would've been different if Fat Pat played (see: Butterfly Effect); and 2) I wouldn't have done that if we had more players. There was no way, and no need, for me to do that if Fat Pat had been there.

But Mike got my point. And he agreed that it wasn't good of Fat Pat to leave a team in the middle of a season just because it was losing, but he did provide me with an insight from Fat Pat's perspective. According to Mike, Fat Pat just felt like it was futile to play when Geoff just did all his stupid turnovers. I could understand that, but I suppose the difference between us is I had more patience for Geoff than Fat Pat. But now it seems, that even Geoff doesn't have enough patience for himself.

We had a good talk, and it was good to get that off my chest to someone who knew the circumstances. He also told me that the team he and Fat Pat were playing on now on Sundays just needed to win the next last game of the season to make the playoffs. I couldn't help but wish that they didn't, to spite Fat Pat.

Look, I like Fat Pat. I even considered him to be my best man if I were to ever get married. He's been a good friend and team mate all these years. But one lesson in life is that it's not how you start, but how you finish. You can be a good friend for a decade, but if you end something badly, I'll guarantee you forgiveness won't be there.

Yesterday at court we didn't have a jury, but we had to attend anyway because the judge wanted to discuss our computer issues. GS and I sat up at the front because RB's team wasn't there. It was quite empty actually. I felt sorry for CW because he was the only one there and he didn't know anything about computers.

I was listening intently, trying to be a poor man's DC, wanting to push GS every inch possible. I did push him a bit by writing a note about how the judge was trying to limit us to a particular period when the evidence didn't show that at all. GS took it up, which I was proud of.

So anyway, we finished before noon, and GS headed off. I stayed back to do a bit of work but found it hard to focus, so I left in the early afternoon to go home.

I went to the auto store near my place to check out some car wax, and bumped into Malay who was there to get some paint. We talked a bit, and he said he was going to a friend's bday that night. I didn't get any wax because it was too expensive, and I'm kinda low on money right now.

I went home and bummed around a bit before getting ready for movies with A and G.

I walked there because it was so close and I didn't want to drive my car. Mid-way there A called me and I told him where to park. I walked around that area and thought I saw him drive past me, so I called him. He said he would flash his lights so I could see if it was him.

I thought I saw some lights flash but asked him to do it again to make sure, and he did so I started walking towards his car. As I got closer, he pulled away, drove into the streets, and then returned further down the street. I was thinking "wtf?" but when I saw him, he told me that when he flashed his lights, the guy in the car in front of him yelled out "what do you want??", LOL! So he drove away and came back at a distance because he feared the guy might damage his car, haha.

I asked him about his marriage and honeymoon as we walked to the meeting spot. He said he travelled across Europe for four weeks with his wife, and that the French were, despite the stereotype, quite nice, but the Italians were rude. A also talked about his work - he was in a new job now, which sounded great. I wonder how he gets to jump around with such ease.

As we were walking along the road, someone came up beside me and when I looked it was G. You could sort of feel the awkwardness between the two as they hadn't seen eachother for so long, and I don't even think they were friends in high school.

I think A actually wanted to go watch the football game because it was on, but G said he didn't, so movies it was. We couldn't decide on a movie so we flipped a coin between District 9 and GI Joe, even though I had already seen District 9. I didn't mind seeing it again, and I didn't really want to watch GI Joe. I think this must be a first where I've preferred to watch something again rather than something I've never seen.

I got a medium popcorn and coke, G got a bottle of water and A got a slurpee. A sat in between us, and I tried to share the popcorn but they didn't really want any. A talked a bit about his work, and G asked him where he worked and then asked "got any positions?" and I felt so embarassed, I felt like sluming down in my chair and disappearing. I mean, I understand that he's looking for work, but come on, you just met the guy after how many years, and you didn't even know that he had just started, far out.

The movie was still pretty good. I liked it and felt the same emotions I felt when I first watched it. Things seemed a lot cleared now, it was like I knew what to look for. But I did, however, sit there thinking about how I wouldn't watch it for a third time.

I was so afraid that A wouldn't like it, because he had hinted that he would've wanted to go to the football game, but he said it was pretty good, so that was a relief. I knew the movies wasn't the best venue to catch up since you can't really talk, but I couldn't think of anything else.

After the movie I needed a lift home and chose to go in A's car even though G offered. It's just that I knew A wanted to talk, so I went with him. Bad thing was that it wasn't a long trip to my house, so we didn't get to talk as much as I would've liked. I asked him if he wanted to play in the Thursday comp next season, and he was open to it. We also talked about my surgery, and he suggested I change hospitals because the one I was signed up for was very busy, and it was normally an 18 month waiting period instead of the 12 months.

Well, I'm sure glad he told me that, because now I'm going to have to think about changing hospitals.