The Prawn

"But dont look back in anger"
-- Don't Look Back in Anger, Oasis

On Sunday I wanted to get up early and play some ball, but was too tired so slept in. I was thinking about washing my car when Malay called me up asking me if I wanted to go to the auto store with him. I didn't have anything else to do so I said yeah.

I had a shower and then went to meet him outside the auto store. While I was waiting, I saw Thai and his wife coming from across the road. We had a bit of a chat before their bus came. He was taking her out to lunch in the city. As their bus departed I thought about how his wife seemed a little similar to Eva - quiet and submissive.

Malay showed up after that and he got some wax and polish from the store, the exact same brands that I have. He wanted to wash his car, and I found myself not being as enthusiastic as last time, although overall I was still willing to help. Maybe I was just tired.

We went back to my garage so I could get my tools, and then went back to his place to wash it. It's getting pretty clean. I knew one wash wouldn't really bring it up to scratch. His mom got his sister to bring us some drinks, which was really good cause it was such a hot day.

After that we went out to the city for some KFC, and cause I needed to get a train ticket. We couldn't seem to stop talking about how bad it felt in hindsight to attend the wedding if in reality their relationship was as how Michelle described it.

I was secretly hoping he'd bring up something about Ele and I that day, but it never came up.

We caught the bus back home, and I got off before him. Just after I got off, I found myself looking at this lady who seemed to have gotten off from the bus in front of my one. At first I thought she looked like nurse lady. Then I thought she was nurse lady's sister so I focused my vision a bit. Then I realised...it was nurse lady!

As soon as I realised it was her, I looked away, but she never avoided eye contact like I thought she would. She didn't really have much of an expression - she just looked straight at me. Maybe there was a small element of bitterness in that stare, I don't know. The other thing that stood out was her make up - she really made herself out to look like some sort of dark evil witch. It added a few years onto her.

As I walked back home, I couldn't help but think of that Oasis song, "but don't look back in anger, I heard you say".

I wonder if she feels any resentment towards me. I can't see how she could. From my point of view, it was her fault she rejected me. She's made her bed, now sleep in it.

Later that night I got a call from Shuing. We had a talk about Saturday night. As much as I wanted to have a go at how lackluster Michael L and the actual wedding were, he said he kept quiet at the dinner because there might be some sort of explanation for the way he treats Eva. The bottom line was he didn't accept what Michelle said at face value, he wanted to analyse things on a deeper level first before coming to a judgment. I've always said he should've been a crim lawyer.

He also brought up Ele, saying that, because he sat right opposite us during lunch, he thought we seemed pretty close together. I didn't want to narrow any options of mine, so I just said I didn't know how I felt about her. He questioned whether Ele had said something to Eva about the seating arrangements so that I would be next to her. If only he knew that I was the one who switched the name tags around.

Court today saw just DC and I, because GS was somewhere else in another matter. DC actually cracked a joke with the judge to start the day, which I thought was pretty smart.

During a break I wanted to avoid the dock so I went outside into the lobby area for a bit. I had my head down checking my phone and noticed a female figure standing sorta in front of me. I started making a call and when I looked up realised it was that cute blonde camera woman.

During morning tea, I was lining up with Rom Rom at the cafeteria, and she just out of the blue suggested we could catch up for a movie if I had nothing to do. Ummm...ok.

We lost another juror today. It was one that we all liked as well. He basically wrote a note saying he was feeling stressed due to work and family issues, so he found it difficult to concentrate.

I was kinda shocked after he left, and I couldn't concentrate myself. Hard to believe there could be some kind of emotional attachment with someone you've never spoken to, but only seen nearly everyday for the last year or so.

I had lunch with Rom Rom, RB, DY, CW and Twish. We all talked about the juror thing of course. I ordered calamari and chips, and on one of the last calamaris, spilled a lot of oil onto my tie, which really gave me the shits because it was one of my favourite ties. Luckily, a few wipes made it disappear. Guess that's what separates nice material from ordinary material.

The hot waitress at one stage came to collect the little number stands which tell them which table the food is to go to. She was struggling a bit to reach the last one, and I laughed a bit, and she looked at me and laughed as well. Hmmm.

After work I caught the train back to the city with Twish. In court I had a bit of a long talk with her about what I should do. Basically my problem was this: because I'm on the DDP waiting list, and because they're my first preference, any job that I get in the meantime would be temporary, and so I don't want to work at a place for a week and then leave, in effect fucking up my name. So I was asking her whether I should do that or try to wait it out, on the assumption that I'd get called up. She said I should wait at least till the end of September.

Anyway, I felt like talking more about it, so that's the only reason I agreed to catch the train with her. She actually wanted to get a hot chocolate but I said I was in a rush. She asked me what was the rush and I just said I needed to go to the gym.

When we were on the train, I didn't feel comfortable talking about my issues on a full train, so I decided to talk about her plans for a trip. She got out her lonely planet guide and showed me her plan for traveling around South America. I must say she is quite brave to do that all by herself. I don't think I could do it. She's probably more brave in getting a loan for it without even knowing how it can be repaid. But I guess you kinda did that with your gambling addiction.

I bummed around home a bit before going to the gym. I did some light weights, abs and the bike. My legs felt really tired cycling, but I made myself push on. I did some light grocery shopping after that, and then went home for dinner. Library guy called me earlier and basically asked me what I was doing after my case, and asked me again to work with them. Funny thing was he also suggested I ask John.

Throughout the whole of today, and even yesterday, I kept thinking about a video I took on my phone on Saturday during lunch. Basically I made a video at the table, rotating around to show everyone at the table, kinda like how they do it on That 70's Show. When it reaches Ele, she is trying to hide her smile, knowing that the camera is headed her way. She eventually looks at the camera, it swings past her but then returns to her. I didn't know what to say, so I said "spicy eh?" and moved the camera closer to her. She nodded but I kept moving the camera towards her until she laughed out, backed away and said "yes".

Watching that just makes me feel all soft and romantic inside. It makes me like her even more. It really had a 'boyfriend-girlfriend' type of feel to it. I tried to watch it every chance I got.

It also reminds me of that final scene in District 9 where the prawn guy is making a flower for his wife. Even though he can't see her, he still thinks about her and makes gifts for her. I feel the same way. Because of 'the challenge', I cannot see her, probably for a while, but at the same time I can't stop thinking about her. Watching the video is like making the flower. It reminds me of her, and seeing it makes me happy.